The Bargain

Chapter 9

~AZRIEL~

Azriel wondered if Gwyn got any sleep last night. Because he sure as hell didn't. He had walked her home last night, took her straight to her door, and then gone back to the townhouse only to lie awake.

Gwyn had lost someone she cared deeply for.

That had made him grieve for her.

Gwyn had been raped.

That made him want to hit something. Preferably the piece of shit who had attacked her.

Gwyn thought she was broken.

That knowledge made him want to throw up.

So, yeah, between the rage and the nausea, Azriel hadn't been able to sleep last night.

His alarm went off at exactly the right time that morning, but everything else about the day felt wrong. He had been in a situation like this before: right after his mom's diagnosis. There had only been that terrifying word. Cancer. He had felt so helpless; numbed by the shock. But then her doctor had laid out a treatment plan - an aggressive one, one aimed at keeping her alive, getting her cancer into remission.

Maybe that's what Gwyn needed too. A treatment plan to show her she wasn't broken. Azriel had been mulling it over all morning. He thought about it as he got dressed. As he dragged Cassian out of bed and to the rink with him and Rhys. As he skated with the team and then hit the weightroom for a few extra sets. And by the time he emerged exhausted and hungry from the Sidra, he felt he had a decent plan put together. Now he just had to convince Gwyn it was the only course of action.

When they got back to the townhouse, Azriel snuck up to his room. He didn't want Rhys or Cassian overhearing this conversation. He texted her first, to make sure she wasn't at work in the library, and when she texted back to say she was free, he called her instantly.

"I know why you're calling," Gwyn said in lieu of a proper greeting. The words came through the phone quickly, like they were racing to escape from her lips. "You're probably worried that I was serious about calling off the bargain."

"Actually-"

"I thought a lot about it and it's not fair to back out of tutoring just because I realized that I'm not ready to date Tarquin."

"That's what I wanted-"

"So, I'll still tutor you. It's not your fault that my destiny is to end up a spinster with a bunch of cats. Just the other day Nesta was suggesting-"

"Will you let me get a word in edgewise, Berdara?" Exasperation laced his every word. There was silence on the other side of the line. Azriel had just enough time to worry that he had hurt her feelings before she spoke up again.

"Sorry. I didn't sleep at all last night and had about four cups of coffee this morning which is way beyond my limit. But you're the one who wanted to talk, so I should probably let you talk."

"Good, because I think you're going to want to hear what I have to say."

"Oh, really? What's that?" Azriel chuckled. Gwyn just couldn't seem to stop talking. He could picture her pacing her dorm room, hyped up on caffeine. If he was there with her, we would gently stop her and see if he could get her to focus on him for a moment. Maybe take her hand between his and wait for her to lock eyes with him. "Shit, sorry. I'm really shutting up this time."

"I think we should stick to our original bargain. But I'd like to change our goal. Instead of just trying to get Tarquin's attention, I think you should try to get yourself ready to date by really pretending to be my girlfriend; not just appearing to be."