"Love Yourself..." TBHK Kou x Reader

Chapter 3

TW: self-harm. edited on: 9/18/23. i still have to edit the other chapters so they match up with y/n. and also yokoo and satou don't exist in this. and yes i finally changed it so actually hanako isn't your cousin (which wouldn't make sense thats why i changed it if you're new) but y'all still related.

You wake up to the sound of your alarm clock. 

"Ughhh..." You sigh. You touch your hair, feeling that it's damp because your wet pillow. 

You think about what happened yesterday. You sit up, groaning. You look at your mirror, already seeing the imperfections and the dark circles under your e/c orbs. 

'Ugly.'                                                                                                                             

'Fat.'

'Disgusting.'

'You look homeless.'

'You'll never be good enough.'

You wipe your tears as you finally stand up. You walk to your bathroom, tears dripping down your face. You lock the door, with a determined look on your face.

You grab the small blade that was once on your desk, wandering how it got here.

At least you now don't have to go and get it.

You push the blade against your wrist, scraping on your skin. Blood comes oozing out, while you wince in pain, but yet feel relief from your thoughts as you cut. You cut yet again; more red patches appear on your arm. You felt droplets forming in your eyes, and you feel their cold temperature glide across your face. You drape bandages on your arms, a light sting coming from your cuts. You lock eyes with yourself in the mirror, knowing that you, Y/N, will never be good enough. Your eyes drift to the clock and-

'Shit! I'm going to late to school!'

You rush your clothes on, but yet being careful at your arm. The uniform feels uncomfortable as always, but you rush the sense away. You slip your favorite hoodie on, making sure to cover your wrist. You rush out your door, your stomach rumbles, but you ignore it. 

"Oi, Y/N-san! How are you today?"

You turn around. It's that weird Minamoto Kou guy again. "Oh, hi Minamoto-kun. I'm fine, thanks for asking." You stare at the ground. His cheeks get a tint of pink on them which surprises you. "So, uh, I was wandering if you wanted to h-hang out at lunch?" He shyly asks. "Sure, I guess." You accept. "Yay! Thank you so much!" Minamoto jumps onto you and gives you a big hug. "Ack!" You shout in surprise. "Sorry! I just got a little excited." He apologized. "It's alright." A tiny smile forms on your face. Minamoto sees this and a grin forms on his face. "Alright Minamoto-kun, I'd ought to be off. See you at lunch." You wave and walk to your homeroom. You step in, students everywhere. You find your class, which Kou isn't in. The thought makes you a little sad. 

When lunch comes, you rush to find Kou. You find him climbing up to the third floor of your school. 'I wonder where he's going?' Your thoughts jumble into more questions. You decide to follow him, just so you guys can talk. He walks into a girl's bathroom. Kou's definitely not a pervert, so you follow him in, wondering what the heck he would be doing in there. You walk in and find an old friend.

"Wait, I've seen that face before.."

A floating boy, Minamoto, and a girl turn around.

"Y/N-san?" Kou says.

"What the actual fuck is going on." You state. You observe the other people near Minamoto, they was a very beautiful girl with really thick ankles and a floating boy with choppy brown hair with amber eyes. 

"Uh.. do I know you?" You ask the boy. "I wouldn't think so, I've never met you in my life or after-death!" He laughs. 

You think back to the old portrait in your kitchen, seeing that exact boys picture. 

"Oh, you're Yugi Amane. I'm Yugi Y/N. I think you might be my great uncle or something."

"Alright then! Nice to meet you, Yugi Y/N. But, in all honesty, I wasn't ready to share my name yet with Yashiro. Next time say that to me in private." Amane flashes you a harsh glare and gets a firm grip on your wrist, tears forming in your eyes. 

"What the hell?" You yell, grabbing everyone's attention. "Y/N-san, what is it?" Minamoto questions, Amane glaring at you again. 

"Uh, come on Kou-kun. It's nothing. We have to head to lunch. See you all later." You drag him out of there, realizing he's been gazing at you this whole time. "What?" You ask. "Oh, I-uh, you just called me 'Kou-kun'..." He nervously responds. "Oh! I'm so sorry! I won't call you that anymore and again I'm so sorry-"

"It's fine! I was just mentioning it." Kou stated. "Alright then." You both walk side by side to the cafeteria, his hand grazing yours, both of your face's turning blood red.

You both sit at an empty lunch table, watching everyone else happily eating with each other. "Hey, at least we've got each other." Kou looks at you and smiles. "Of course. Do you have any other friends?" You ask. "Ah, no. But I guess that's okay. I have you now!" 

I guess when you meet up with Yashiro and Amane again.

"So, what's your name?" You ask. "I'm Yashiro Nene! Nice to meet you!" Yashiro says. You shake hands, and it's her turn to ask a question. "How can you see Hanako-kun? I mean Amane, I guess." You wonder why she calls him 'Hanako'. "I don't know, I just can!" You respond.

They all look at each other with worry.

"What is it guys? You can tell me."

"i-It's nothing don't worry about it!" Kou says. "Alright then. I've gotta catch my next class. See ya!" You run out. But someone stops you. "We have Home Eco. together, remember? Do you wanna walk with me?" You look behind you and find Kou, you nod your head and walk to class together.

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ok uh edited 9/18/23 

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