𝐑𝐞𝐝 𝐑𝐢𝐝𝐠𝐞

A A R O N

With her spine suddenly straightening, Charlotte speaks for the first time in a while, her voice wobbly but hardened by something unidentifiable. "I'm going to be requiring a new donor if we're going through with this, otherwise, I'll be refusing the transplant," She says and my chair screeches as I stand up and looks down at her.

"Over my dead fucking body, Charlie," I seethe and her eyes widen, the red-rimming them making them all the more brilliant and I huff. Though I surprised her with my outburst, she stands up to face me, tilting her chin up in defiance and she narrows her eyes.

"I don't care what you think. This is out of your control, it always was. This is my problem, and there are other people willing to help. We have insurance. I don't need you going through this with me out of guilt. You have a life and you should be allowed to live it."

"You think I donated my bone marrow to you out of guilt? Did you ever think it may have something to do with the fact that you're my sister and I love you? That maybe I want you around?" I shout, unable to keep my voice down. "Don't you dare do this to me. Don't take away my choice." My voice cracks and I feel a tear fall down my face.

"Don't take away mine." She says, softer now as she leans her head into my chest, heaving from the exertion of raising my voice, from the stress making my heart work overtime.

"I need to stop for a minute."

"Me too, let's both just calm—"

"No, I mean stop dancing," I admit and she falls silent. Pulling back, my sister looks up at me once again, awaiting an explanation.

"What do you mean, Aaron?" She hesitates as if she truly doesn't want to know the answer.

"I'm hurt. I've been killing myself to be perfect and I can't do it anymore. You have to let me do this. If I can help, I can use this as an excuse to finally stop. I need to stop." I nod and I don't realize that more tears are streaming down my face until Charlotte's hands reach up to wipe them away, cupping my face. The expression she looks at me with is full of pain but she tries to hold back her tears this time.

"That's not right...you should stop, that's true, but not like this."

"Charlie, you don't understand. I have to stop. I need help. Let me help you. You'll be helping me too."

"Donating bone marrow is no small thing. You won't be getting any stronger by giving up part of yourself. Literally."

"Charlie, if I don't stop I will break. What do you think losing you would do? I need you right now and you need me." Nothing will deter me from this. I'll donate anonymously if I have to.

"You're basically blackmailing me, Aaron."

"If I may..." The doctor cuts in and I blink a few times, wiping my eyes with my shirt. "I'm sure you know this, but having a close sibling as your donor increases the effectiveness of the treatment. Also, stem cell transplants have now been proven to be more effective, and I'd recommend that as your course of treatment. That would be if an autologous transplant isn't viable." She says, and the next hour is filled with questions from both Charlie and I about what the treatment plan looks like and how we'll go through with it.

"So we're doing this," Charlie says to no one in particular.

"Seems like it."

"I would recommend this treatment plan for you," The doctor adds.

Charlie looks at me, not questioning in her expression but with more of a sadness to it that makes me pull her into another hug. We dismiss ourselves and I don't think that either of us remembered that we'd kicked Alexander out over an hour ago, yet here he is, head perking up as he's alerted of our presence.

"Charlotte," He breathes, reaching for her hand and I watch curiously as she looks to him for comfort suddenly. He seems distraught, yet unwilling to ask any questions, despite most likely having way too many. Puzzles are difficult to put together without the big picture.

"I'll leave you two to chat," I say, looking back once I get to the end of the hall to find that they haven't moved, the two of them seeking comfort in each other's arms as if this is only a small hurdle in the future they plan to build together.

Only now do I think of Maddison, how I left earlier, and how or if I'm going to explain this situation to her without causing an even larger rift to open up between her and my sister. My guess is that Maddison won't understand the sacrifices that I'm willing to make for Charlie, but I want to tell her anyway. I want her to be the person I confide in about these things, and I want her to care about them. About me.

What I feel for her is strong, but where I attempt to push myself out of my comfort zone, she seems to want to keep me firmly situated there, taking it slow with the inexperienced virgin, whether for my sake or hers.

The hospital walls are familiar now, in a way that they weren't before. I memorize my way back to the front lobby, silently praying for a reason not to have to, but knowing in my heart that I must. Knowing that this is all for my sister's sake keeps my eyes open and my feet moving forward, one step at a time.