𝐝𝐞𝐣𝐚 𝐯𝐮, peter parker

xlvii. different paths

chapter forty-seven
different paths

    NINA HAS LEARNT, very quickly, that the universe enjoyed throwing her off-course. Making her stumble and gasp and reconsider everything she had been so sure of. She used to be so sure of her life, and in the past few years, what she was so determined to believe about herself━about the life she wanted━has tossed and it has turned. It has deviated off towards a different path filled with mishaps and dead-ends and ditches, and while the essence of her dream was still there, so much has also been added, and then changed━or completely switched.

    She also quickly realised that most of these road bumps and these sharp turns and these thrilling chases have been the result of one, single person. For whenever she thought she should give up━whenever she cursed and declared that nothing could ever be. The universe reminded her that despite how much of an empty seat Peter Parker has become ... some days━some very special days of her life, he was there. 

     And it left her stumbling. It left her tumbling. It left her wondering what the universe was thinking when it chose her to play with, because no matter what, Nina Hart loved Peter Parker. It was a realisation that hurt but also filled her with this sense of understanding and accomplishment. To realise and understand she loved someone had a warmth and a comfortable feeling that swelled her chest and settled in her heart. Then to know that even if she was sure, deep down, Peter Parker felt the same way, there was always something stopping him from meeting her halfway. 

    She was standing here, on this small stage in front of many different people yet again who could change her life━give her everything she wanted, and yet, as Nina Hart spoke of endless possibilities, scientific exploration and this damned universe ... he was on her mind. 

     And maybe it was her distraction━or maybe it was her nerves, but as she got halfway through her presentation, Nina stammered.

     She froze up, and she held a breath. It was so quick that no one noticed━at least she hoped not. The likes of the people watching her today: liaisons from OSCORP Industries, NASA━even members of Stark Industries were eyeing her from the back. Everyone John Jameson had managed to wrangle with the best words and best affirmations that Nina had the potential to bring about a scientific future left her shaking and her heart trembling. 

     Because what if she wasn't? What if she was way over her head. She was just a girl still in college stepping into waters many try but never succeed to swim in. Who was she to think that she could every be amongst them? 

     Nina closed her eyes and fiddled with her prompts. Some had started to wonder what had made her stop, sharing glances and muttering under their breaths. She took a deep breath, stop it, she scolded herself. In the crowd, John was trying to make her feel better, subtly giving her thumbs up and lightly gesturing for her to keep on going. MJ who had managed to sneak in at his side, was very out of place with her elaborate grinning and motions that made others glance at her, incredulous. 

     Beside them was a seat that was not filled. Another empty seat. Harry Osborn. Even with his company watching her, he did not have time to support his friend. A boy who used to be desperate to be there for Nina; to give her flowers and give her wonderful affirmations ... was so drunk in his own wallowing obsession that no one━not even his closest friends and his allies; the people that cared about him━mattered anymore. All that was on Harry's mind was Spider-Man, and mysteriously, the webs linger had disappeared off the earth, as well.