The Arrangement

Chapter 10

"Close the door," Theo tells me. The suite bedroom has a sitting area near a window that looks out to the gulf. Theo sits on one of the chairs and gestures for me to take the opposite one.

I close the door and sit down.

"I'm glad you decided to audition," Theo says. "I'm choosing you. Tara is great. But she's a service submissive, last time I did this arrangement, my submissive was a very sweet, very obedient pet. It was fun, but I've never played with a brat before. What I experienced the other night at Kittens... you made me want more of it."

"Are you sure? I'm a handful," I challenge.

"I'm sure," Theo says. "There is one matter I wish to speak with you about first, however." He hands me a sheet of paper. It's a copy of a news article from five years ago. The picture is of Mac and I standing together.

"Death Knyght's lead singer, Mac Ryder, spotted with young blonde bombshell," the headline reads.

My eyes widen. On Mac's request I'd been a bleach blonde at that time. "Where did you find this?" I ask.

"During our background check, we happened upon it," Theo says, he sits back. "Were you his submissive?"

"A girlfriend," I correct Theo, my eyes meet his. But that girl in that picture is not me. Even looking at the picture, I can see the fear in my eyes. I'd wanted so badly for Mac to approve of me. Something he'd never do.

"Are you still with him?" Theo asks.

"No, we broke up about eleven months ago," I say. Broke up for good this time. Whether Mac likes it or not.

"Do you mind if I ask a few questions?" Theo asks. "You don't need to share if you don't want to."

"You can ask a few and I'll tell you whether I can answer them or not," I say.

"How long were you together?" Theo asks.

"Seven years," I say.

"He's like fifty now," Theo says. "That would mean you were eighteen when you—"

"Just barely eighteen, yeah," I interrupt.

Even going into his fifties, Mac was still easy on the eyes and capable of being very charming when was necessary for him to get what he wants.

"So?" I say, my gaze narrowing at this judgment. Theo is doing the math in his head.

"How did you meet?" Theo asks.

"We met when I was sixteen. I was a Death Knyght fan," I say. "I was attending a concert with some friends. He spotted me in the crowd. I guess he liked what he saw."

Theo looks momentarily disgusted at that. I don't want him to see me as damaged goods.

I don't want to linger on the memories. I was young, vulnerable, fatherless, my mother strung out and on government assistance, a little sister to care for, and starstruck. All these things Mac had counted on. They were his tools he could use to control me.

"Mr. Ryder wants to see you and your friends," I'd been told. It had felt like a fantasy come to life. "What's your name, kid?"

"Really?! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh! I'm Evie O'Brien!" I'd squealed.

When Mac had approached me, he'd seemed so genuinely kind and caring. A freaking rockstar was taking interest in me! Be like the father I never had. It hadn't taken him long to convince me he was going to take care of me and protect me and Autumn.

"I'm sorry, I won't ask you anymore," Theo says, his brow furrowing. I realize my face is showing my fear.

Shit. I hate that it's still obvious that he wounded me. Fuck you, Mac.

My therapist (when I'd had enough money left over from Mac to afford one) had said it would take time to heal.

Feels like it'll take forever.

"It's okay, I want you to ask whatever you need, I realize that must come as a shock to you, what's an ex girlfriend of Mac Ryder doing stripping at a club?" I say with a dry laugh.

"That's not what I was thinking," Theo says, he tilts his head, my cynical reaction seems to bother him. "I was thinking how did a rock legend like Mac Ryder mess up so bad that he lost a girl like you?"

Flattery? Fuck you, Theo. Don't you dare try to win me over with flattery.

That's my snap reaction to a compliment like that and I take a deep breath.

I'm triggered. Got to get a grip. Where's a pole to dance on when you need one?

Doing pole tricks always helps me get present and in my body when I get stuck in my head. It's such a high contact activity.

"That relationship ran its course," I say with a shrug, "I was young and dumb and starstruck. He wanted a submissive young thing to play with. He did cocaine and wasn't a good boyfriend to me. That's all you need to know."

"I met Mac at his concert four weeks ago," Theo says, shaking his head. He doesn't comment further on what his impression was, but I'm curious in a way that spikes my adrenaline.

"She's a liar," I heard Mac say to Gabriella when she'd answered his phone call in my stead to tell him off. "I've done so much for her, and she acts as if I'm the bad guy."

"Have you dated since, Mac?" Theo asks.

"Yeah, a little," I say. "I had one guy I hit it off with. He wasn't kinky. But we had a little fling for three months. I didn't want a relationship with him because I didn't feel we were a good fit long term. He wanted one, so we said our goodbyes. That was three months ago. I'm currently single."

"That's understandable," Theo says, he seems sympathetic. I want to believe it's genuine. "I wanted to ask some of these questions because after this talk, we'll slip exclusively into role play. Do you feel that the power dynamic exchange is really something you're comfortable doing?"

"Thanks for asking, I have been in therapy, and have talked to my therapist about my kinkiness, I do actually enjoy being submissive, I have to feel safe, however, that's a big rule for me. I've had kinky interaction that didn't end in making me feel safe. So far, I've felt respected by you, and especially after reading over your paperwork, I feel more encouraged that this will be an enjoyable entertainment gig. And I know if I say a safe word, all play will stop," I say to him. I'm not going to divulge anymore. He doesn't need to know. I'm here to be a fantasy, not a real person. After four months, I'll only be a memory anyway, no need to bother Theo with details like this.

"It will," Theo says. "But I want you to do whatever you need to feel comfortable. I know aftercare is very important for a submissive, but it's also important to me. I need to know that what I'm doing isn't hurting you. So I truly need you to be honest and upfront any time you're outside your comfort zone. I could be wrong, but it sounds like you've had some trauma and the last thing I'd want to do is bring any harm to you."

Mac never gave me any aftercare whenever he'd done anything kinky with me. He's indulged in my kinks, but never in being tender with me afterward. I remember educating myself on BDSM and pointing it out to him, to which he shrugged and said he didn't feel like I needed that from him. To hear Theo say all of this... it's a relief.

"Theo, I appreciate your concern," I say, our eyes connect. "I promise I will always let you know. I genuinely love kink, even before I got with Mac as my boyfriend, like I said, I tried to convince my high school boyfriend to play with me in a Dominant and submissive type of way. I believe that if our interaction is anything like it was at the club the other night, that I'll have a lot of fun with you."

"Good," Theo says. "Get some rest. I'll see you, Wednesday. I'll have an Uber pick you up and bring you to me."