I Love You Just the Way You Are (Book 1- Rock Canyon Series)

Chapter 31 - Maddie

Chapter 31 – Maddie

MangaGuy06: "No, I couldn't tell. And I didn't see the tags, but I do now. I got lost in the cosplay and how beautiful you are that I didn't notice the rest of it ;)... Being transgender doesn't change the fact that you are still attractive to me! ...but I'm guessing others at your new school have a different opinion?"

I clicked pause on the recording of my old stream, the first one that Kellan chatted to me. I wrapped the towel tighter around my shoulders, having moved beyond tissues at some point yesterday.

It's Sunday afternoon, and by now I've watched all of my old VODs at least twice. I've been holed up in my room, not eating, barely remembering to drink water. Yet somehow my body is still able to produce fresh tears, every hour on the hour. I would be fascinated if it didn't hurt so much.

I kept staring at his name tag. MangaGuy06. I keep asking it the same question over and over again. Why didn't you just tell me? You could have told me the first night we hung out.

I could hear his voice telling me that he was afraid that I'd freak out, that he didn't want to ruin us after we just started. And I could see waiting maybe a few days, but six weeks? And to talk to me multiple times as if he was somebody else? That was unacceptable. I couldn't forgive him for that.

The sun had moved its way into my windows and I shuttered most of the curtains, leaving me sitting in a weird pool of semi-darkness, watching the dust swirl in the single strand of light still piercing through.

I braced myself and cycled through to the next video. This was the one that hurt the most. It's the video where Kellan had subscribed to me.

MangaGuy06: I'm happy to be able to support. You know, being 16, and trying to subscribe to a channel on here, it's not easy! I had to go down to the nearest grocery store and find like a specific prepaid card that Twitch will accept.

I held the towel up to my eyes while I shuttered violently.

You went to all that trouble just to subscribe to me, only to have me almost punch you the next day. And then you still kept coming back... so why were you so freaking weird about not telling me that you knew about Twitch? You could have told me who you were and it would have meant so much to me. What was your game, Kellan? Why did you keep it a secret and keep talking to me?

Receiving no answers, I shuffled to my bed, collapsing with the towel over my head. I didn't bother to move it. I heard footsteps pounding up the stairs, louder than anyone in my family.

Is it him?

I thought about diving under the bed. I didn't have any makeup on, I hadn't slept, and I didn't want to ever see him again, anyway.

The knock was loud, sharp, and continuous.

"NO! I don't want to see you ever again!" I yelled, my voice broken and raw.

"Girl, that's no way to talk to your best friend. You better open this door or I'm going to break it down. You got five seconds. Four. Three. Two-"

I opened the door and collapsed into Destiny, sobbing against her chest. She wrapped me in the tightest hug ever, immediately rubbing my head and consoling me.

"Shh, it's okay. Let's go sit on your bed." I held her hand like it was the only thing stopping me from falling into an abyss. In a way, it was. Charlotte followed close behind. We all settled into the bed, pulling the covers over us. Destiny spooned me, and Charlotte spooned Destiny. I really wish I could have taken a picture of us, I bet it was so cute. Destiny squeezed me tight against her.