Gibbs is pacing back and forth in the waiting room of the hospital. He'd been like this since they'd gotten there, four hours ago. He walks over to the trash can and throws the cup in his hands away. The trash can is filled to the rim with Gibbs' coffee cups from the past few hours. He picks up the cup on the table next to the trash can and takes a sip.
"Gibbs, just sit down already," Vance says, he was tired of seeing Gibbs go back and forth. He knew Gibbs well and he knew that he was beating himself up over this. But it wasn't his fault. "No, Leon. I need to be alert," Gibbs tells him.
"Alert? You're not even close to alert! You're drowning yourself in your thoughts. It's not healthy," he says. Gibbs stops pacing and turns to look at Vance.
"You know what's not healthy? Killing everyone you've ever loved!" he says. "You didn't kill them, Jethro! It isn't your fault. None of it is,"
"Just, go and get some fresh air. I'll call you, if there are any updates," Vance tells Gibbs. "Fine," Gibbs says and walks away. He takes the elevator down to the car garage and finds his truck. He gets in and buckles up. He starts the vehicle and starts driving.
He didn't know where he was going to go, he just needed a break from it all. Thoughts start to rush through his head. Thoughts that he didn't want. Thoughts that didn't help him.
"This is all your fault. You don't deserve to be loved. You're a murder. You killed Shannon and Kelly and now you've killed Jack. You don't deserve your life," The thoughts just kept coming.
Gibbs starts feeling more and more helpless. This wasn't like him and he didn't know what to do. He pulls over and tries to reach for his phone but instead, his hand grabs the knife out of his pocket and he starts to cut his wrist. He pulls the knife out and as soon as he throws it to the passenger's seat, his hand moves towards his gun. "No, no. Not that,"
YOU ARE READING
Deck the Halls - A Christmas Special
Romance*SUICIDE, PTSD & ABUSE AWARNESS* Jacqueline Sloane and Jethro Gibbs have always had a connection. They've always clicked. They viewed the world very similarly and they were just so alike in many ways. Neither had ever admitted it but there was a spa...
