Do You Realize? |l.s.|

XXXVIII

Waking up, I groan in pain as I squint my eyes, the light burning them. I let my eyes readjust before I slowly move to sit up, wincing when I do. When I turn to look around, I realize I'm back in my old room, only everything is slightly different, now. There's new furniture, new curtains, and new decorations.

I look to the nightstand beside the bed I'm lying in to see some painkillers and a glass of water. I take them, wincing with every movement I make to fully sit up, before looking at my arms. There's bruise after bruise on them, and without even looking I can feel that it is the same throughout my entire body. 

I hear talking downstairs and figure it is Zayn and Harry, memories flooding back into my brain as I struggle off the bed. I feel soar, my body aching as I slowly make my way towards the bedroom door. I get out of the room, hearing better the conversation going on downstairs and I start down the steps. The must hear me because their conversation stop, and I hear them coming towards me before they come into view as I round the corner and they smile gently at me.

"Hey kiddo, what're you doing up?" he asks me. I just shrug, and Harry comes over to me and hugs me as gently as he can.

"How're you feeling?"

"Like shit," I answer, causing Zayn to chuckle.

"I bet," he agrees. "Are you hungry? You've been out for a while."

"How long?"

"All night. It's 10 now," he explains.

"No school today?" I ask in confusion. I could've sworn yesterday was Thursday. 

"As if you're in any kind of shape to go today," Harry scoffs.

"As if I ever am," I roll my eyes.

"Louis, why didn't you tell me how bad it was? You said he was different," Zayn sighs.

"So what? I could come back here for another year or two and he can come back even stronger and angrier than he has this time?" I ask.

"You'd be an adult by then," he explains.

"And you really think he'd stay away?" I ask him. "I'm the only fucking supplier of money! How else will he have the money to get pissed and stay out all night? He'd go after me."

"You can place a restraining order," Zayn tries. 

"Whatever, Zee. Not like you haven't already told the police," I mutter, crossing my arms.

"I just don't get why you're so angry. This should be a good thing, your dad's basically out of your life for good, now."

"Yeah, but he's still my dad," I say. "He'll go to prison like he deserves, then he'll get out. How the fuck will he support himself? He's too fucked up to stay afloat."

"Kid, he may be related to you, but he never was your dad. He was just someone you got stuck with."

"It's easy for you to say," I sigh in defeat. I know he's right, but he's family and besides, mum always liked for us to look out for each other. He cousin was a drug addict and instead of staying out of any trouble, she did everything in her power to make sure she could get back on her feet. Maybe my dad just needs that; an opportunity to change his ways.

"Well, there's no going back anyways," he sighs. "Try not to dwell and rest up," he says as he walks out of the room.

"He's right," Harry says, sitting on the edge of the bed and turning to me.

"I know he is," I roll my eyes. "Doesn't mean I can change how I feel."

"Your dad doesn't deserve a second thought from you. You've already given so much," he continues. "It's a shame you're too good of a person to see that."

"You'd feel the same if the positions were reversed," I say.

"So would you," he says quietly, giving my leg a pat before he gets up and leaves the room. I mean, I guess he's right. If it were him or Zayn getting hurt by their dad, I'd send that fucker off to prison before he could blink. It's like I said, though; it doesn't change how I feel. I hate the man with every fucking inch of my body, but as much as it pains me to accept, I also love him.