Do You Realize? |l.s.|

XXIII

I know I've been acting super awkward around Harry lately, but you can't exactly blame me. He just basically ripped my heart out and stomped on it, so I'm not gonna act like we're just mates and I'm not affected. We're walking to school and the kiss has been running through my mind ever since the party. I can't help but to ask about it through our uncomfortable silence.

"So, I uh, I saw you kissing some guy at the party," I say. I know how random it is, and I was hoping there would come a conversation where the party magically comes up, but it's been a while of waiting and I'm desperate, at this point.

"Oh, yeah," Harry nods awkwardly, neither one of us looking the other in the eye.

"So..." I say, waiting for him to explain, but he doesn't. "What's up with that?"

"The kiss?" he asks.

"No Harry, the election. Of course the fucking kiss," I sigh.

"Right," he says. "It was alright."

"Alright as in good?" I ask. He's acting so weird right now.

"Alright as in alright, Lou," he sighs.

"So, you two are a thing now?" I guess.

"What? No," he shakes his head. "We're just friends."

"Do you kiss all your friends, then?" I ask in confusion. Honestly, it feels like he's speaking another language to me.

"I mean, we sort of liked each other but we decided to stay friends," he explains. Wow, way to explain it simply, Harry. You couldn't have said that thirty seconds ago?

"Oh, that sucks," I tell him sympathetically. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it was my idea."

"Why the hell would you do that? And why are you acting so awkward, anyways?"

"I just liked someone else, y'know? I think we sort of found each other attractive, but nothing more."

"Oh," I say, my hopes of having a chance with him being crushed, yet again. The second I feel like there's even a sliver of hope, he goes and finds a new crush. "Who is it?"

"No one you know," he coughs. 

"C'mon, tell me about him. Please, Haz, I'm dying to know," I beg, tugging on his jacket sleeve.

"Alright," he chuckles. "I mean, he's really funny, for starters, and I mean really funny. He's also super pretty, and he's got really nice eyes. Oh, and he's like, kind of annoying, but in a good way, if that makes sense?"

"Annoying in a good way?" I say skeptically. "You must be really falling hard if you think them being annoying is attractive."

"Yeah, I guess," he says. We go the rest of the walk in silence. I don't know what he's thinking about, but what I'm thinking about for the entire rest of the day is the jealousy pooling in my stomach.