In Her Darkest Hour ✞ Theseus Scamander

xviii

Hours have passed since Theo, Charlie and Orsino rushed into the hit wizard lobby and disturbed their day. Since then, Andrew and Newt had joined the others out on patrol, and Vaughan had been placed in charge of the grounded hit wizards who disobeyed Andrew and Travers. They were not to leave the office, unless any circumstance, permitted by Andrew, arised.

Theo and Vaughan were in the midst of their third intense game of wizard chess. Orla and the other boys, sat beside them back at Robbie's desk, themselves having an intense discussion about their personal lives.

Orsino, the baby of the group, had been with his girlfriend for four years, since they were both fourteen. However, since working at the Ministry, their relationship had become strained as he lived in London on his own, whilst she still lived at home with her parents all the way back in Penzance, three hundred miles away. In the six months that he had been working at the Ministry, Orsino had seen her a total of six times, once a month. Even Orla had seen Theseus more often when she was in Uganda, and even more often when she and Andrew began dating. His hopes for salvaging his relationship were beginning to die out, as their letters became more infrequent and as though there was nothing else to talk about. Whilst the boys promised the young boy that it would all get better, Orla couldn't help but notice how similar her situation with Theseus was, she knew they would soon come to an end if they couldn't salvage their relationship soon.

Similarly, Charlie has just experienced what Orsino might soon. Young, twenty-two year old, Charlie, was fresh out of a relationship with his childhood sweetheart. Charlie and Lily had been together since they were thirteen, and their relationship's downfall derived from the same issue as Orsino's. Lily was at home in Rhyl, whilst Charlie was living and working in London six out of seven days a week. It was only on Sunday's that they saw each other, and even then Charlie would be gone early the next morning, just in time for work.

"It hurt a lot," Charlie admitted. "I didn't even realise the change, I felt like everything was fine. But seeing her once a week for years straight, really does something to her when her life isn't as jam packed as mine."

"What are you gonna do about it?" Robbie asked.

"Stay single for a while," Charlie shrugged. "Somehow, even though it hurt a lot, I knew it was right for us to split. We were so young and naive when we started dating, and it was like we had kept that same love throughout, just little kids, until Lily started to realise that it wasn't what she wanted."

"I'm sort of the same," Robbie admitted. "I've been single for three years now, the girl I was dating before, we had been together for three years, so since we were eighteen. I knew she wasn't the right one to begin with, but I kept trying to make it work because I did really like her. And I thought, if I keep trying, I'll eventually fall in love, right?"

"But, you didn't," Orla sighed.

"It's hard knowing you've strung someone along for three years," Robbie nodded, "especially when you've given this false reality of you loving them."

Orsino looked over to Astrix, "What about you, Trix?" Orsino asked, "feel like we don't know anything about you."

"I used to be engaged," he shrugged. "To a girl named Hannah, I'm sure Robbie and Charlie know of her, considering Robbie's the year above and Charlie the year below."

Orla narrowed her eyes, as she looked at the boys' faces, they dropped just like their eyes, as though they knew how badly it all ended.

"She's a muggleborn, Orla," Astrix said, his eyes fixated on her. "Daddy didn't approve, wants me to keep the Black bloodline pure. No filthy mudbloods."

"So you listened?" Orla questioned.

Astrix nodded. "It was a spur of the moment thing, the engagement, I got drunk one night and thought I was in love," Astrix shrugged, "I proposed to her the night I got accepted here, then my dad called me a fool and told me to end the relationship, so I did, but not at my own hands."

"What do you mean?" Orsino asked.

"I became a shitty boyfriend," Astrix shrugged, "didn't give her much attention, stayed late at work, stopped visiting her every week. She got tired of it by October, told me to focus more on her or she'd leave, and I explained the price for working for such a hectic department in the Ministry. So, she broke up with me and called off the engagement."

"Clearly, she didn't love you enough herself to carry on through the hardships," Orla shrugged. "Young love is often naive, no offence boys, but as a woman, I have lived through it just like you all have."

"Sometimes, I forget that you're thirty," Theo calls from his chess game.

Orla obviously looked offended by Theo's statement, so much so, Astrix had to intervene.

"What he means is, despite you being a little bit older than all of us," Astrix rolled his eyes at Theo, "we still view you as our own age, because of how well we all get on. Despite the fact you baby us all, half the time."

"Me? Babying you guys?" Orla scoffed, "maybe, Orsino, yes. But, the rest of you, I come to you for advice."

"I hope you don't mind me asking, Orla," Robbie spoke up, "but, isn't now the best time for you to ask for advice about Andrew. Earlier on, I saw all of your thoughts and it's clear you're not entirely happy."

"What've we missed?" Charlie asked.

Orla sighed as Astrix explained their conversation earlier.

"When you said you think Andrew is the right one for me," Orla started, "I can't help but have doubt so hard, that there is a knot in my stomach, growing tighter and tighter. Something in the back of my mind is telling me this is wrong, I love him with all of my heart, but I feel as though our marriage next spring will not go ahead."

"Perhaps, it is because you have just recently moved in with each other," Orsino said. "You were long distance for a while, and now, here you are living together and because of stupid fucking Carrow, working together too."

"Yeah," Charlie nodded, "you're probably too worked up by how much time you're spending with him in and out of work. Maybe the two teams teaming up wasn't a good idea."

Orla shrugged, "I'm not entirely sure myself."

"I think it is just nerves," Astrix said, "the day will become and you, won't literally, but you'll be shitting bricks as you walk down the aisle. Then you'll marry and have a gorgeous honeymoon in the south of France and you'll wonder why you ever doubted it all."

"I think you should listen to your gut, Orla," Robbie offered his advice. "Your gut is always right, and you may have reasons behind your doubts that just aren't known yet."

"I suppose," Orla sighed, "in the meantime, only time will tell. And I love him like, but like you say, there is something there that I cannot point at."

Deep down Orla knows the answer. She knew her doubt arised ever since she saw Theseus again for the first time, ever since she took off her wedding ring so he wouldn't know she was engaged or who to. Maybe seeing the first man she ever loved again fucked with her head, but maybe, just like he never stopped loving her, she never stopped loving him. The whole thought was sickening to her, but she could not lie to herself, there was something still there between them, lingering in the darkness of lost love and unspoken silence. They both felt it and even now when they look at each other as friends, it is in the air, unspoken still. And with people like Astrix picking up on it, only time will tell if Andrew does too.