LOVE WITH ERROR

Chapter 16

LOVE WITH ERROR!
Whenever we lied once to the people we love, we make an imprint of that lie in our hearts, and in the dire struggle to cover up that lie, we keep on piling up lies on top of lies just to protect that relationship we are building. We will think that we have gone too far to be caught, not realizing that karma will surely end the journey of lies and betrayals.
Omar was still sitting by a tree outside the school clinic while he was crying and regretting what he did to Stephen. He wished he hasn’t lied to him, he wished he had told him about Kabir. He wished he didn’t let his heart so soft to Kabir. More tears rolled on his face as he remembered Stephen’s promises to him the last day they had sex…
“You are mine and mine alone Omar. I will take care of you with all I have. I will make you happy to the best of my ability and I will assure you this promise. The only thing I will not take from you is cheating, lies and betrayal. The moment you make me provoke, you will have to live the rest of your life in fear of the name Stephen, and I will assure you this also.”…
Omar sniffled as Stephen’s words keeps popping in his mind; he could clearly remember how serious Stephen was looking the time he made that promise to him. He is sure that Stephen meant what he said and he will stand by his words.
Tears where still rolling from his eyes with his face locked between his legs when he heard his name being called, he slowly raised his head as he could still recognize the voice he heard. That was the voice of his greatest enemy, the person he currently hates the most, the angle that turned to devil and the nightmare he will never forget.
His eyes turned red at the sight of Kabir who was standing with a smile before him. Omar slowly stood up and faced Kabir with a fiery face. “I thought you were my friend Kabir, I thought I had a brother in you all along, I thought I could trust you with my life. Little did I know that you are a monster and a devil, a wolf covered in dog’s skin and a traitor from hell.”  Omar yelled at Kabir.
Kabir giggled as he slowly moved closer and holds Omar’s mouth. “I know you want to curse and hurt me so badly, but you shouldn’t do that yet. Let me finish justifying my acts first, then you can yell at me any how you want.” He said as he inserted his hands in his pocket. “I know currently I don’t own a good image in your heart, I would rather tarnish the whole image then.” He added with a smile as he moved closer to Omar.
He sighed deeply and continued Talking. “You see Omar, I never had regrets for anything I did to you because you deserve it and more. You already knew from the beginning that I treat you special, you knew my feelings for you were not normal, you always knew that I love you but you act so ignorant because of selfishness.” Kabir said with his eyes turning red.
Omar who was also burning in rage stared at him with his red eyes as he speaks. “You knew I always wanted to have you Omar, I always treat you special because I want to fuck you. I want to hear you moan my name even in my dreams.” Kabir said with a weird smile on his face. Omar was about talking when Kabir hold his moth again. “Let me finish talking.” He yelled.
“I already told you that I have no regrets for what I did Omar. I know I don’t have a chance with you and that is why I made sure no one else will have a chance with you, not even Stephen. I did what I did to fight for my love. This is a war of love and we are allowed to use any weapon we have available. I know you won’t come back to me and I am also not asking. I am tired of chasing you Omar.” Kabir said as he turned and walked away.
He slowly paused and turned to Omar after a few steps. “You know what Omar? I think all these happened because you are too naïve. You always thinks people around you are as good as you are. You are so emotional and that kills you. I just hope you will get to fix that loop in the future. Good bye Omar.” He said as he walked out of Omar’s sight.
Omar stood dumb folded and speechless. He couldn’t say a word as he stared at Kabir while he walked away. Of course he knows Kabir was right. He was stupid to trust him and also stupid to believe him. He should have open up to everyone in the first place; maybe things wouldn’t have been this worst. Omar wiped off his face as he staggered and walked home…
Cleo slowly opened her eyes to the bright colors of the clinic. She rolled her eyes sluggishly and found her mother sitting by the chair beside her. He mother quickly rushed to her and helped her sat up. Her eyes landed on Nelson who was still standing by the wall looking so pale. Tears started rolling on Cleo’s face that she couldn’t hold back.
He mother kept on insisting and inquiring on the reason she passed out but none of them could say a word. The school nurse came into the ward and examined Cleo for a while, she discharged her immediately because she regained conscious already. Her mother packed her stuffs and helped her stood up but Cleo sat back on the bed.
She looked at her mother for a while. “Can I have a moment with Nelson for a while Mom?” Cleo asked looking as her mom. She nodded and walked out of the ward leaving the two of them alone. Nelson quickly knelt on his knee and crawled to Cleo. He was also looking remorseful with tears on his eyes. He couldn’t say a word to Cleo because he is totally ashamed of himself.
Cleo sighed deeply and closed her eyes for a while, she opened them slowly again still with tears on her face. “Why Nelson? Why did you choose to punish and embarrass me this way? What have I done to you to deserve this? Why did you lie to me all this while Nelson? Am I such a fool to you? Why would you do this to me? You know clearly Andrew is my best friend right?” Cleo asked crying so hard.
Nelson who was still kneeling on the ground sighed deeply as he continued crying. “I never had the intention of hiding my sexuality to you Cleo. I thought I could say it out to you all but the more I tried doing it, the more discouraged I become. I have always wanted to speak out but I was trapped between love and family ties.” Nelson said looking at Cleo.
“Andrew has no fault in all these Cleo. I don’t want you to ruin your friendship because of this. To be honest, he has always tried to end everything between us even though he was there before you. My parents introduced you to me the day I was supposed to take Andrew home and I couldn’t deny their decision.” Nelson added.
Cleo was already looking surprised at this point. Nelson sighed deeply as he continued speaking. “Andrew has always tried his best to make me choose but I always pretended not to be able to, even though I knew I wanted him all along, but I also don’t want to ruin your happiness Cleo. That was why I kept on lying to myself and also to everyone around us. I wished I was more courageous and told you everything.” He added still looking sad.
“We planned on telling everything to you all after the prom party, I wanted giving you a memorable dinner before breaking up with you, but I didn’t know how James found out about everything and picked a fight with Andrew. I wished I was the one who break this to you.”
“I know I am a traitor and a betrayer. I know it will be hard to forgive me but I want you to find a place in your heart and forgive Andrew. He has always pitied you all through this and never wanted you hurt. Please Cleo, just punish me instead of him.” Nelson added still while crying.
Cleo was still crying after listening to Nelson. She was quiet for a while before she sighed deeply and faced him. “As much as I want to understand your situation Nelson, I couldn’t see any justification to your acts. You had all the chance to decline me and reveal your true sexuality, but you decided to be selfish. It would have been better if you are true to yourself Nelson, but you decided to use me.” She said looking at him.
“Do you even know the most annoying part of this Nelson? You betrayed my trust. I trusted you but you hide your identity from me. I don’t hate you because you are bisexual, but I just don’t believe you are. How should I believe that you loved me all these while? How should I believe that you weren’t with me just to make your family happy?” She asked with tears on her face.
Cleo slowly crawled down from the bed and stood in front of Nelson as he holds her legs still asking for her forgiveness. She sighed deeply as she stared at him. “I hold nothing against Andrew, because I am sure you poisoned his heart just as you poisoned mine. But as for you, I am not sure if I can forgive you. And if you can remember my words to you, I still hold my stand on them. I will never turn back once I sighted a betrayal.” She said as she removed her legs from his hands and walked away.
She rushed to the car where her mother was waiting and cried so hard. “It is over mom.” She said as she fell on her mother’s lap and continued crying. Her mom comforted her but she couldn’t stopped the tears from oozing on her face. The pain of what Nelson did to her kept on chocking her heart. She felt used and neglected. She continued crying as she couldn’t find a spot in her heart to forgive Nelson…
James managed to follow Justin to his house but he was too late as Justin has already locked himself in his room. He stood by the door banging it so hard and calling out Justin’s name but he wasn’t opening the door. He was crying as he apologized to Justin but he still didn’t open the door.
James sat by the door for a while till it was becoming late already. He sighed deeply as he regretted what he did earlier. He hated himself for picking a fight with Andrew. Even though he did it out of pity for Cleo and Charles, he never thought things will get out of hands this far.
He should have focused on his relationship. He should have talked amicably with Andrew, but he allowed jealousy to take control over his heart. He has envied Andrew all these years and that was why he always tried so hard to drag Andrew to the mud.
This was the moment he realized that Andrew always wished him well by insisting on him to spill out his plans to Justin. He wished he had adhere to Andrew’s advices and focused on his relationship instead of exposing him. He wept slowly while still sitting by the door waiting for Justin to open the door.
It’s almost late when Justin opened the door to his room. His fair face was paled and swollen because he has been crying for a while. The expression on his face only shows hate and anger as he stared at James who was kneeling on the floor. He hissed as he turned to walk back to the room but James holds his legs tightly.
“Can you hear me out please Justin?” James pleaded with tears on his face. Justin sighed and paused for a while. He cleaned his face and turned to James. “You have 10mins to justify your acts.” He said looking at James who started stammering and couldn’t bring up any word. Justin giggled and moved closer to him. “Just as I imagined James, you don’t even have a proper explanation for the shit you did.” He said looking angrier.
He sighed deeply and adjusted himself. “Is it that hard for you to follow my instructions James? I always had a bad feeling about you picking a fight with Andrew, I tried my best to stop you but you were so stubborn. We would have all been happy in the prom party by now, but look what you caused James. Are you happy?” Justin asked staring at James who was looking embarrassed.
“You know, I always thought of how you would accept me into your life after all what we went through before, after all the hate and bullying, but I also thought that love has no condition. I was such a fool to believe that you will love me whole heartedly James.”
“I should have known that you are a bitch just like Andrew said. Where was your conscious when you were playing with my heart even after learning about my condition? Were you planning to give me a heart attack all in the name of prank?” Justin yelled.
He sighed again as he hold his head. “It is over James. I don’t think this will continue between us. Thank you for sharing my grief with me. I want you to leave my house and my life because I don’t want to have anything doing with you again.” Justin said as he walked back into his room and banged the door behind him.
James stood by the door and continued crying before he sluggishly walked out of the house. He is so ashamed of himself because he is a whole disgrace to himself and his friends. How would he face Andrew and Cleo after what he did? How would he fix his relationship after the whole scandal? This is where jealousy has leads him to, a spot of regret…
Andrew managed to walk home with his heart feeling heavy. He couldn’t take the shame after what happened at the prom party. At this point, he hated himself for cheating on Cleo and also for using Charles. He felt terrible within himself as he walked home with hurtful tears on his face.
He entered the house and met his mother sitting on the couch. The whole sitting room was messy, looks like she just had her daily fight routine with his drunkard of a dad. He quickly rushed to her and hugged her and she also hugged him as they both began crying.
His mother sniffled and hugged him tightly. “You can cry all you want Andrew. Stop holding it in there. Let it out and you will be free.” She said as she was also shedding tears. Andrew exhaled loudly and faced his mom. “Why are we so unlucky with relationships mom? Why am I in a messy relationship and you ended up with a wrong man?” He asked staring at his mom.
She sighed and wiped off her face. “It’s because we are too soft Andrew. We might look hard on the outside but we have a soft heart Andrew. We are easily carried away by the word love.” She said looking at him. Andrew was still crying when he told everything that happened to his mom.
He sighed deeply and hugged her tightly. “I hate myself mom. I shouldn’t have betrayed my friend and used an innocent student. I shouldn’t have followed my selfish desires. I should have let go of Nelson in the first place.” Andrew said still crying.
His mom sighed deeply as she slowly wiped off his face. “Life is full of tragedy Andrew. The more we expose ourselves to what we think are best for us, the more life shows us how wrong we are. You might think you are fighting for love when holding on to those people, not knowing that you were building up your destruction.” She said looking at him.
She giggled a bit and adjusted herself. “It is too late for both of us Andrew. I wished I learnt this lesson on time so I could teach you also. I wished I learnt more about love so I could lead you as a good mother. I wished I had installed in your heart that fighting on for it doesn’t worth it when we have to offer our comfort and peace of mind.” She said looking pitiful.
Andrew slowly seat up and leaned on his mother’s shoulder. “I know things have gone worst beyond repair mom, but at this point, I just want my personal happiness back. I don’t care if I hurt anyone in the process including Nelson. I will put myself as priority and do what makes me happy.” He said looking at his mom.
She holds his hands tightly and smiled at him. “I am happy you realized that your happiness should be your priority. Let’s leave this country Andrew. We don’t have anything left here. Let’s go far away and find happiness somewhere else. Let’s leave and build our personal peace.” His mother pleaded holding his hands.
Andrew smiled at his mother and nodded his head. “Yes mom, I think it is time we live for ourselves. As much as I loved Nelson, I think it is high time I let go of him for my personal peace.” Andrew said looking at him mom…
TO BE CONTINUED…