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march 2004

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From the very beginning ― even before knowing the truth ― Rose had decided that she won't open her heart or life to the people of Theo's past. And while her opinion of the Malfoys has changed a little, she was not going to change her mind. She wasn't going to let those people into her life. She couldn't do so, it was too confusing. 

She told her decision to her mothers first and they supported her with no questions asked. 

Theo wasn't surprised either but he was worried for the Malfoys. He was very worried actually, and nervous. He knew Draco's family wasn't going to take the news well though he was quite sure they were aware of Rose's personal thoughts and feelings. 

So two days after spending her afternoon with Narcissa, Rose asked the Malfoys to meet her. 

"Are you okay sweetie?" May asked.

Rose was doing her hair, trying to decide whether she should wear her hair up or down. She thought it was quite ironic ― how she couldn't figure out how to wear her hair for the day, while she had easily made a life altering decision, like the one regarding her biological family. 

"Yeah," said Rose and turned to look over her shoulder to face her mother. "I'm fine."

May sighed and walked over to Rose. She placed her hands on the girl's shoulders and kissed the top of her head.

"It's all right if you aren't," she told her daughter.

Rose chuckled dryly. "Then I won't be a horrible person?" 

"You are not a horrible person, Joy. You were fair, you are fair. It's better for them not to expected anything. Let them move on too," May explained while brushing her fingers through Rose's blonde hair. 

"God I wish I would still hate them..." Rose admitted. "It would be a lot easier."

"Maybe it's good though? That you don't hate them anymore," said May.

Rose shrugged. "Maybe but it just makes this a thousand times harder."

"But you know you don't have to..." May stared but Rose shook her head immediately. 

"I do. Mima, I want my life back. If all of this would had happened ten years ago or something, then maybe... but now it's just too much. I need to move on with my life and I can't do that with them hanging onto me like I'm a lifeboat of their past."

May nodded. "As long as you are fine with your choice. You know Mimi and I support you no matter what. And so do everyone else in your life."

"I know," Rose said and offered a small smile. "So, to break their hearts and crush their dreams, should I wear my hair up or down?"

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