Home for the Summer (BOYXBOY)

30 | All-nighters and Other Idealistic Fantasies

I bolted out of the study as the door slammed, chasing Benji down the hall. "Benji, please. Let me explain."

"Explain? Explain what," he gave a wry laugh. It didn't fit him. "Because it looks like you've been telling me that Lilli 'definitely likes me' all while you two were still together. Some friend you are."

"No, I swear. That's not what happened." He finally turned once reaching the living room. Lilli slid to a stop behind me, mouth pointed down and face red with embarrassment. "I don't- Lilli and I aren't together."

"No, of course not. You're keeping things casual, right?"

"Benji-"

"You literally just told me to ask her out, man. Couldn't you have warned me that now wasn't a good time? That she was seeing someone else?"

"I'm not," Lilli interrupted. "I just kissed him."

Benji extended his arms and Izzy and Rowan peeked in from the hall closet. "Yo, everything okay?" Izzy said.

"Oh, good," Benji smiled before pointing at me. "Apollo's just an asshole."

"Benji-"

"You told me that you didn't like her. You ended things weeks ago. Why... Did you lie?"

"I wasn't lying," I huffed out. "I'm..." My voice trailed off as I pondered whether saying the words would actually be a good idea right now. I had no other choice. "I'm with Nicolas. He and I are together."

Benji's eyes widened and Lilli, who was still behind me, audibly gasped. "You just kissed a girl."

"He did what?" Nico popped in from the kitchen.

I honestly felt like throwing myself off a cliff at this moment. Every sentence that left us added a new, worse addition to the mix. The ratio of people on my side to people who misinterpreted went 1:3 and I wasn't sure whether to laugh at the sheer ridiculousness or sob.

"Nico," I said. "It wasn't-"

"I kissed him," Lilli interrupted.

"So, how long have you and Nicolas been a thing, then? How long have you been lying about that?" Benji was practically yelling. I had never heard such seriousness in his voice.

"Since LA," I rushed out. "But, I was going to tell you."

"And, did you know that you liked him when you were together with Lilli? Or, were you lying to her, too?"

Izzy stepped in, leaving Rowan to float beside the open door. "He wasn't lying, Benji. Apollo didn't purposely use Lilli, but-"

"Use her?" Benji glared at me. "What the fuck does that mean?"

I opened my mouth but Izzy waved her hands. "Just that, he knew he was gay, but wanted to make sure, right?"

"Wait," Lilli said. "So, I was an experiment?"

"What is wrong with you?" Benji shook his head. "It's one thing to be discovering yourself, but it's another to mislead someone and drag them along. I mean, how fucked up do you have to be to manipulate someone like that just so you can be sure you aren't into them?"

"Benji, man," Izzy said. "You've misunderstood. Just sit down and let him explain things."

Benji's eyes flickered with this strange, unfamiliar heat before he focused on me. "How long have Izzy and Rowan known, then? How long have I been the only fucking person that you decided to keep this from?"

"I told them today," I said as my voice finally found itself. "I wasn't trying to keep it from you, I swear. I just didn't know how to tell you."

"Well," he replied, glancing around the room. "I'm sure glad it came out like this." After a pause, he tugged his backpack over a shoulder. "Go to hell, Apollo." And with that, he was out the door.