Killer Smiles (Discontinued?)

Billy Blues (11)

July27, 1996
Benji's POV
In 2 hours it will be 10 months since Billy and Stu killed Maureen Prescott. In 2 hours it will be 1 month since I watched Billy kill my father in front of me. 3 weeks since I started giving Billy the cold shoulder, only talking to him when necessary and dodging his touch. I get Sid's no sex rule now, hard to get in the mood when images of your dead parent keep popping up.

My fathers body was found early the next morning, so when I woke up to half the town knowing and my mother doing everything she could to break the news softly, I'll admit I had a mental breakdown. I spent about 10 days without talking, which I guess was lucky because I couldn't snitch on the boys. Randy stayed basically glued to me, doing the talking during those days. Sidney and Tatum came over a lot, I didn't expect it to help as much as it did, while at the same time made my guilt pile just a smidge higher everyday.

Tick tick tick

1 hour 30 minutes until it's been 1 month since I genuinely became scared of Billy. He's tried to apologize: notes, phone calls, in person, even made Stu his message boy for a while. I think he's finally realized how badly he fucked up, was he expecting me to happily kill the man who raised me? Even if he sucked at it he still put some effort into caring for me. The worst part would probably be the press. Every day for at least 2 weeks if I even looked out the window my picture was taken. Walked into school *CLICK* cameras everywhere.

Surprisingly, I don't feel mad at Stu, not even disappointed, wasn't his idea. He gave me some time before contacting me, then when I called him he came over and did everything he could think of to cheer me up. About 3 days after it happened, Randy, him, and I spent 12 hours straight watching my favorite movies, even though Randy hated some of them.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

1 hour left. I've been laying awake for hours, just waiting until midnight. Why? Couldn't tell you. Maybe it's guilt, maybe anger or sadness, probably a combination of the 3. Before I can check my clock again, I hear a quick knock on my window: Billy.

I turn my body the opposite direction, knowing if I even glance at him I'll end up letting him in. I know I must be fucked in the head, but I miss him Ya'know. He's my oldest friend, the one who would comfort me when my dad hit me or ruined another event, he's the one who got me into horror, which I guess looking back could have been a sign of the future. Another couple taps at the window draw me from my thoughts. I hold up my middle finger while tugging my blanket around me tighter. Another tap followed by the window openi- I forgot to lock the son of a bitch.

I shoot up in a futile attempt to close the window before he gets in, but just end up colliding with Billy.

"Get out"

"Come on Benny just talk to me" he reaches to entwine our fingers.

"Don't call me that, you don't get to now." I jerk my hand away and push his chest, creating a safe distance between us.

"I'm sorry, please tell me how I can fix this, I don't want to lose you Benji." The quiver of his voice is like an arrow to my heart, taking a deep breath I gather my thoughts.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

40 minutes left. I begin a step towards him, letting my foot hover a moment before putting it down.

"Why couldn't you just listen to me Billy? I told you I didn't want to kill anyone, but you had to do it anyway huh?" I steady my voice as much as I can, hoping he thinks my body is shaking because of the draft he let in. He takes a step towards me.

"I know that now, I won't do anything like that again, promise. I just didn't know how to trust you unless you were as deep in it as me and Stu. I shouldn't have doubted you Benny, I'm sorry" he sticks his hand out, pulling it back a bit before I reach out and take it. Quiet takes over the room, me looking towards the ground, rethinking my last move while Billy lets out a deep breath as he lets his fingers wrap around mine. He closes the gap until he's standing right in front of me, tilting my head to face him. A small streak on his left cheek is evident in the moonlight, I take my thumb and wipe it away like he did that night.

Tick. Tick. Tick.
20 minutes till midnight.

"You won't regret this, I promise Benny" the weight of his head rest on my hand as his other arm slips around my waist, pulling me as close as possible. We stand like this, not speaking until I hear the beeping of my alarm.

July 28 has come.

I let quiet sobs leave my body as I hug Billy, his arm reaching to end the beeping before it takes its place around my waist again. He kisses my forehead and starts rubbing my back, only pausing for a small moment when I instinctively tensed.

"Please don't be scared of me, you and Stu are the only people that matter anymore, please don't be scared of me Benny, I won't hurt you."

We move to lay on the bed side by side, until I finish crying, wiping my tears on my sleep shirt.

"I saw it in person Bill, knowing you kill is one thing, seeing it was so much worse" I see hurt flash by his eyes but, just as fast as it appeared sympathy took its place.

"I know, I'm sorry, I really am. I shouldn't have killed your dad, I should have at least waited till you left the room, I'm sorry" I meet his gaze and feel some of the weight leave my body, searching his chocolate brown eyes for any sign he's lying. When I'm satisfied he's not, I lean in for a soft kiss.

He pulls away after a few seconds, pink cheeks lifted slightly by a smile.

"I love you Benny, I need to go home and rest for school tomorrow if you're ok alone?"
He brushes my hair from my face, even though it falls back after I nod.

"Good night Bill"
He looks back at me as he climbs out the window his smile smaller but still visible.

"G'night Benny, sleep well"

The window closes and I turn to my side, sleep coming easy now that at least one of my problems have been solved.