Volume 1 - Top-Tier Character Ayanokōji-kun [DISCONTINUED] [READ THE REVISION]

SS - Hinami Aoi: Lingering Afterimages

I could feel sweat forming on my palms. My breathing became erratic once more. It feels like I've been walking down a dark tunnel for miles upon miles, but I hadn't moved an inch. I could see a light at the end, but with each step I took, the salvation it gave off faded just a little bit.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

Aoi, pull yourself together. Don't remember that. You're safe here. You're safe. There is no person capable of inhuman and horrible cruelty here. It's just you. 

Mom already wondered what was up, and I had to think of some random excuse. I rushed as quickly as possible to my bed. My bed is safe.

Don't remember him.

No.. "him" is not the right word—rather, "that". W-What... was that? Why? Why did that need to happen? Why did I remember—

Stop yourself, Aoi. Do simple breathing exercises.

...

Okay, now I feel more calm. My heart's still beating as if I was currently fighting for my life, but it will go away with time. I've survived, albeit a simple miracle in my mind.

My throat and mouth are completely dry—it's as if every inch of moisture had left my body. Where's my water? My water bottle was supposed to be next to my bed. It was always there. Where is it? Why can't I find it?

Oh.. there it is. I stretched out my hand and grabbed the bottle—

and it fell down.

AH! Oh god..

I've suddenly become hyper-sensitive to any and every small and insignificant stimuli. I seriously got scared by a water bottle falling down!? The creaking of the door... the sound of my air conditioner.. why am I noticing everything!?

My hand was shaking uncontrollably. My fingers were about to give up. I had no control. It felt like someone else was puppeteering every movement of mine. My body and mind did not wish to cooperate. It's like I'm being squeezed through a very small, very tight rubber tube—I can't hear, breath or see on my own. While I am safe in my loneliness, the overwhelming darkness inside of me is struggling to break free once more and see the light again.

I quickly put my hands together. Would it help if I rubbed them against each other? It's supposed to be a calming movement.

I did and... it actually worked. It felt like a mother's gentle touch. Like a fire keeping me warm, it crumbled the coldness surrounding me. Each time I stroked my hands, my mind distanced itself one step from insanity.

Breath.

Okay. I grabbed the bottle once more. Slow. Methodical. Careful.

I moved it to my mouth, and opened the cap. The cooling sensation of the cold water dissipated the dryness. It was as refreshing as a long awaited rain in barren lands. Much better.

Honestly, I still feel a bit nauseas and dizzy. I can still feel phantoms of the grip around my throat, clutching ever tighter and squeezing every last bit out of me. Parts of my life flashed before my eyes. I.. seriously felt like..

No, I can't remember it. I can feel another surge of liquid coming up. Stomach acid is still hurting the walls of my throat. It's absolutely disgusting. 

The best thing to do in such a situation is to distract oneself.. yes. Distractions will help me. Diverting my attention to something else will help me to calm down. I definitely can't show this side of me to anyone, so I'm captured in solitude here.

I looked around my room for any possible distractions, and then my gaze fell upon... my Blitch. Atafami. I should play a few rounds. I stood up from my bed, but suddenly remembered something—

what if I'm matched up against nanashi?

Why do I keep remembering him!? There's a crushing weight hindering me from making any sort of progress. It feels like my heart's going to jump right out of my chest, my blood a raging river coursing through the veins of my whole body, my head pounding just recalling that abomination...

No matter what I do, I'm suffocating and my brain won't turn to anything else.

I sat back down on my bed again. I didn't try to look at the console. I blocked out all noise. I just stared at the utter darkness of the night outside my window.

My vomit-stained clothes should be in the washing machine right now... I hope they're cleaned soon. I wonder what my mom is going to make for dinner. What should I do for the rest of summer vacation? Something fun, probably. Mizusawa-kun wanted to go somewhere... I hope it's not boring.

Okay. Thinking of other stuff helps. My breathing has stabilized, there's oxygen in the air around me. There's no need to search for a way of survival. There is no endless void staring me down.

...

I need to sort my thoughts logically. What am I going to do now? What's going to happen in school? He said he'd compete in earnest, right? He wouldn't hold back and show his true capabilities. He said he could beat me at everything with putting in no effort at all.. but is that really true?

How much effort has Ayanokōji-kun put in?

If I use simple, straightforward logic—if he was so much better than me, then he must have put in a ridiculous amount of effort. Way more than I did. But...

... I have been doing this since middle school. If he really is that overpowering—how did he gain that kind of strength? If I can trust his words, which I don't know I can, then he must have received some sort of special education. There is no other logical conclusion I could make. You aren't born that capable. He did say he was homeschooled...

But even if I rack my brains now, I'm not able to come up with a logical answer. I'll just end up going around in circles. No matter which angle I take, I can't figure out what he's really after or what the extent of his abilities are.

I give up for now.

Taking a deep sigh to clear my mind, I stretched my arms. I still felt absolutely awful, but I was in a much better state.

There is only one thing I am sure of.

My high school life was about to change.

---

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Here you go, another one. Hope ya' like it.

Also, side story word count may vary greatly from now on. I tried to keep it at least to 1300 words, but that got annoying. So yea, it may be 1k words (like this chapter), even less, or even more than 1300. Who knows? (btw, I plan on writing two more side stories)

Corrections and criticisms are appreciated.

Peace!

- juli0os