The War General

33

With a serious face and a clenched jaw he spoke, "the last time I had saw you you had handprints on your face. I could smell Richards scent all over your face and I knew... I knew he had hurt you but I needed to hear him say it. That night I had so much shit going in my head that I wasn't thinking properly. I became enraged that someone would have the balls to out their hands on you so I went to Danid with Leon...."

Juko pauses again but I hated having to wait for him to get his point across. I unlatched Eden from my breast once she was full and carefully transitioned her into Juko's arms for Elliot. I helped my blabbering baby boy latch on properly to feed as I spoke. "What did you do?" I ask calmly.

Juko searches my unreadable face and sighs quietly, "I figured they were verbally abusive from how they spoke to you but I had no idea that they were actually hitting you and locking you in a closet. When I saw the scratches I knew I fucking knew but like I said I just wanted to hear him admit it. So I barged into your parents castle. Confronted him where your mother outed him, so I stabbed him. I stabbed him in both eyes and ears and cut into his face. He's alive but he can no longer hear or see. I wanted him to feel how you felt for all those years. I wanted him to know how you felt to be alone in the dark suffering except I wanted him to suffer until he takes his last breath. I didn't hurt your mother even though I was moments away from doing so, I warned her before I left."

I'm silent for a while taking in everything that he had told me.

He had took my fathers ability to hear or see, he had hurt him because my family for year had hurt me and made me suffer with no remorse.

At first I didn't know how to feel.

When I stumbled upon the Smith's home I had learned that what it was like to have a real family.

Beth, John and Lucas had treated me with so much love that it sometimes made me feel overwhelmed. They had taught me how to shoot a gun, how to properly love and care for myself, how to not put up with peoples bullshit. I had quickly learned that my family never loved me, that they hated me for some unknown reason and it was possible that I would never find out. I was naive to think that I had done something wrong on my part when reality I did absolutely nothing wrong. I had always been willing to do whatever it took to be in the good graces of my parents. Only it was impossible.

They never cared for me.

They never loved me.

They hated me.

I was unwanted.

I was unloved.

I had been nothing more to them than a pest, a gnat they couldn't seem get rid of without looking like monsters to the rest of Unity.

My love for them had dies months ago and I had told myself that after all was said and done I wanted nothing to do with them. If they died I would feel nothing for them, absolutely nothing.

"I'm not angry with you." I finally say after a while. "What Richard got was well deserved and my mother?" I can only laugh. "I hate them I hate all of them and the fact that I conditioned to believe everything they had ever said or done to me was out of love makes me feel foolish, so stupid. I no longer care for them I'm done."

Juko visibility relaxes, "you aren't stupid Ivy. Anyone would have fell for their lies you were young. It's easy to mold a child into believing lies to fit their agenda. Don't be so hard on yourself baby."

"I can't help it."

"I won't lie... thought you were going to freak out and I had honestly been waiting on you to be back to a hundred percent before I told you everything."