Our steamy Affair

Chapter 15

Remco pov

In the morning, I get up next to Josh, who is still sleeping. When I get to the kitchen, I see Max standing there with a bowl of cereal in her hands. She sits down at the table and I sit down next to her after grabbing food myself.

"Yesterday was," she starts talking I finish her sentence, "a mistake, I know." As I speak these words out of my mouth, it feels like I'm sprinkling salt on the deep wounds.

Her mood goes from happy to sad, which makes me think maybe it meant something to her, would it? It was great, I admit that she was great.

It was the first time I had sex with a girl, and it felt more pleasurable than expected. I never thought I would be able to enjoy sex with someone else like Josh. Josh was the first boy I had sex with.

We sit staring at each other, but both of us don't know what to say to each other. I don't know if I can stop this either, what we have together now.

Actually, I should finally feel complete, although it's not the case at all. I still want to prove myself not to Josh, but to Max who had given me an amazing turn yesterday, even though I feel so ashamed that I came so quickly and couldn't let her enjoy it.

It pisses me off! I have to stop this behavior! I'm almost 22 and would almost graduate, maybe I shouldn't have used my boyfriend's sister and someone on campus. Although I never found anyone at University who attracted me as much as Max did.

She sits there looking at her food, exactly whether being with me has become too unbearable. Maybe I shouldn't have said those words and let her finish first.

Later I go to college and take today's classes and then go to the kayaking club at school, where I have a practice match that day.

Daniel comes up to me, my best friend from school, we have been friends for so long.

I can tell him anything. Only I have never dared to say that I have these feelings now.

Daniel has always been straight and has never made an issue of me being gay and falling for men, that is something I love about him. He has never judged me as so many others have.

"Everything okay? You're so absent today?" Daniel asks me, immediately realizing that something is not right.

"No, I have a confession to make. I slept with a girl," I tell him, not daring to look into his eyes to see the disapproving look in them.

"What have you done! Remco I thought you only liked men?" He asks me, to which I myself don't really know why.

"Suddenly I had these feelings for a girl, every time I saw her I wanted her in my bed.

Even though I know it's wrong, Josh knows I'm sitting with mixed feelings and wanted to know how it felt with a woman too," I tell him honestly, which I've been walking around with for a while.

"Remco you know you can always come to me, this is intense. How are you going to tell Josh?" Daniel asks me, even though I don't quite understand his question, "not, I want to know first if this is just an experiment phase or if I want to continue in this. I love Josh too much, and I really love him too much to be able to hurt him," I say to Daniel, who looks at me thoughtfully.

"Then you're going to have to stop this Remco, otherwise you're going to break Josh and your relationship," he tells me, which is what I was thinking myself. Even though it would break my heart to not follow through with those deepest feelings I've been crawling for a year, but I have to! I have to stop for the sake of saving my relationship with Josh.

Those thoughts quickly dissipate when I get home and see Max walking there in her shorts again and the tight top, in which I can clearly see the outline of her breasts. Why does she have to be dressed so bare? And why can't I stop watching?

When we are sitting in front of the TV and Josh gets up to grab something, I can't help but say something, especially when she keeps crossing her long legs, revealing her black panties. I'm already glad she does have underwear on underneath today, "stop it, Max! Can't you put anything else on?" I ask in frustration, "what's the problem now Remco, you never complained about it before?" She asks me, again staring into mine with those beautiful green eyes.

"Because it bothers me now! Come on," I say as I want to sound angry, but when she wants to protest some more Josh intervenes, "what's going on Max?" Josh asks her as she looks, angrily, at me.

"Your boyfriend wants me to dress differently, he thinks this is too bare!" Calls out irritated at Josh, who looks at me questioningly, "she's been dressed way too nude all the time Josh, she just attracts the wrong guys," I say, looking at her disapprovingly.

Angrily, she storms out of the room, where I hear her door slam from her bedroom. "Aren't you overreacting a little? She's not that naked, is she?" Asks Josh, which pisses me off that he lets her walk around like that.

Angry, I now walk into our room as well, where after an hour Josh comes and lays down next to me and takes hold of me. "Remco, sorry," Josh says as he kisses my neck.

I kiss him back on his lips, and I can already feel his hand going to my pants.