All for our love

Dark memories

Lou POV.
I wake up in a cold sweat startled from a dream, I look around me and see I am laying on our bed with a blanket over me, my heart is beating Viciously in my chest.
I  feel disorientated , I remember being in the panic room, Harry finding me, I don't know how long I have been asleep , minutes , maybe hours but there is only one thought in my head at this time and that is to find Harry " I need to find Harry, I need find Harry" chants in my head as I climb off the bed and walk towards the door stumbling as I go.
" Harry" I call out as I make my way to his office expecting him to be there, finding it empty,  I move through the rest of the house not finding him anywhere.
I make it to the kitchen and see the metal blinds still cover all the doors and windows at the back of the house so I know they couldn't be out there , that left only one place  in the house to check.
I stop at the top of the stairs and look down feeling bile flood my throat, I shiver feeling my skin prickling as my mind drifts back to the only time I had grazed these stairs , and the visions  flood  in hunting my mind.
My father , or Mark as I was to call him calling me a whore, telling me what he was going to do when he got out of there, I remember striding forward and picking up a bat then I started striking him , blow after blow, yelling " I hate you , I fucking hate you" until my body wouldn't let me go any further and I collapsed to my knees with exhaustion.
I put my foot on one of the stairs and I can hear yelling coming up through the stairwell , I take another step and another, until I can make out Harry's voice and I push on.
My heartbeat is hammering in my chest and flooding my ears.
I can now make out other voices as I make my way to the bottom of the stairs.
" Your  husband is a fucking pathetic piece of shit" I hear yelled into the air.
I inch myself forward until I am standing in the door way and gasp at the shock of what I see.
blood so much blood , its everywhere, I look at distorted figures tied up and I turn and run, I hear my name being called but I don't stop, I can't get the sight of all the blood out of my vision, its swirling before my eyes.
I run up the stairs and pass  the kitchen, as a I turn the corner my body slams into someone hard chest.
" Hey kid where's the fire?" I hear Niall voice ask.
I push myself off his chest and keep running , In my mind all I am thinking is "find somewhere safe, somewhere safe away from Harry"
I open the front door and see a mass off people working on what looks like gathering dead bodies that are surrounding the driveway.
I hear myself screech and slam the door and head in the opposite direction.
I thought of the panic room but Harry would look there first, Then I remember my old room, I slam through the door and shut it behind me making my way through to the wardrobe,I fall onto my knees and crawl to the very back and curl up into myself making myself as small as I can,  hoping no one will find me, I try to shut my eyes but all I see is blood swimming before my eye lids.
I feel my body slowly start trembling, I don't know if it is from shock or fear as I lay in the darkness trying to work out what I just witnessed.

Harry POV.
" Where  the fuck is he?"I yell out in frustration as we all gather around the lounge room.
" We know he is in the house so he is hiding" Zayn saids.
" He looked  so freaked out when he ran into me Boss" Niall said .
" Where could he be, where haven't we looked" Liam saids.
" Where is Clifford"Niall saids calling out Clifford name who comes running in front our bedroom.
" Good  boy" I say rubbing his head. " Clifford find Lou" I say he looks at me and gives me a woof , before sticking his nose on the floor, we watch as he sniffs around then woofs agains and starts following the scent ,We walk behind him as he makes his way around the house stopping in front of Lou's old room, he barks loudly signalling to the door.
" Of course why didn't I think of that" I say as I turn around to face the door.
" We will wait out here , yell if you need us".
I open the door and step inside with Clifford coming in I close the door behind us, Clifford walks over to the wardrobe and I open it slightly looking in, in the very far corner I can make out a shape which looks like Lou curled into a ball, my heart breaks a bit as I think I cause him to do this , to be this frighten.
I make my way in and sit on the floor, just short of where Lou is sitting .
" Lou , baby?" I say which startles him, as he screams in fright.
" No no ,no don't touch me " he is repeating to himself, pushing himself hard back against the wall until he can't go any further.
I turn to Clifford and motion for him to move forward, Clifford crawls over to Lou and nozzles his leg, I watch as Lou's finger creeps over and tangles into his fur, I let out a sigh of relief knowing that Clifford can comfort Lou when I can't.
" Lou , baby you are safe, no one is going to hurt you".
I get no response so I sit patiently waiting until Lou is ready.
I start to hear small sniffles coming from Lou as I see his shoulders then start to shake with sobs.
I inch myself closer until I can reach out and touch him.
I use my fingers to start slowly rubbing his back as he is turned away from me, he lets me with out flinching away, so that gives me some sort of reinsurance .
" Lou, baby look at me, you know I would never hurt you Lou, I was only doing my job to protect you" I still receive no answer, I feel a sigh leave my body as I start to turn away.
" Lou, I can tell you want to be left alone so I will be out side if you need me" I say as I make my way to the front of the wardrobe.
I walk out and close the door slightly before heading back to the boys, they all look at me as I walk out.
" How  is he?" Liam said the first to ask.
" He won't look at  me or talk to me, I am just going to give him some space, Clifford is with him" I say feeling a bit depleted.
" Maybe one of us should try" Liam asks " He has had a awful shock I am worried about him".
" How  about I go in?" Niall asks volunteering.
Liam looks at me " it worth a try" I give my head a nod.
I watch as Niall moves into the room, we can hear his mumbling voice , then he is in front of us again.
" He won't talk, I think the best thing to do , is just go and leave him, we know where he is , we know he is safe he has Clifford with him he is bound to come out sooner or later" Liam saids , we all agree to this, as we move away from the door, I take one finally look hoping to see Lou in the door way but nothing.
I turn to Zayn." Let's go furnish what we started" .
" Liam keep an eye on Lou, let me know if he comes out".
I enter the basement to find the one man already dead and the other two still hanging in there , I am so full of rage right now as I pick a  bat off the wall Walking  over to Jo and slamming it into his stomach.
" Who the fuck asked you to roll on us I want a name?" I yell at him, I strike him again.
" I said I want a fucking name" I throw the bat onto the floor , I have had enough of This shit.
I turn to Zayn " finish them" I say meeting his eyes then I turn and leave the room as I hear two shot being fired.
I walk into our room which feel absent without Lou, I go and clean myself up before returning to find Liam.
" He still hasn't come out?".
" No boss".
" Do you think I should try again?".
" I think for now just give him a bit of space, it's been a long few hours and it's extremely late , I am going to find Zayn and head to bed.
" I am going to sleep in Lou's room, I don't want him waking in the dark by himself".
" Good  idea, yell out if you need us".
I walk through the door of Lou's old room and make my way over to the wardrobe  looking in, I can see Lou's body laying across Clifford body and he is asleep, Clifford put his head up acknowledging me.
I turn away and turn the sheet down on the bed, I reach over and turn on the bedside lamp so there is a soft glow in the room, so Lou doesn't wake in darkness.
I roll over and face the wardrobe, hoping that Lou might come out, I feel my eyes grow heavy as they finally close.
Lou pov
I wake shaking from another nightmare and look around seeing that I am still laying in the wardrobe with Clifford under me, I am thankful for the soft glow of light that is seeping through the crack of the door.
My mind is full of images that I don't want to remember, and I so desperately want to have Harry hold me in his arms and give me comfort.
I uncurl my body and my muscles protest from all the hours sleeping on the cold floor, I make my way slowly out of the wardrobe to discover Harry sleeping face facing towards me.
His curls are falling around his face and He looks so beautiful, when his face is relaxed from the day to day stresses of being a mafia boss, and I realise that I love him not matter what he does.
I move to the other side of the bed and climb in pressing my body up against his feeling instant relief, I can breathe better and my mind is calm after hours of turmoil, I wrap myself around him and close my eyes listen to his heartbeat as it lulls me to sleep .

Harry Pov.
I slowly start to wake when I  feel a heavy weight on me, I open my eyes to find Lou asleep across my body and I let out a sigh of relief.
My baby is back in my arms were he is meant to be, I wrap my arms around him tightly and breathe in his scent.
I  lightly run my hands up and down his body gently stirring him awake , I feel the moment he wakes as his body goes tense, then relaxes, as he moves his fingers against my chest as he starts tracing my butterfly tattoo.
" Baby are you ok? is the first thing I want to know.
I wait for him to answer then I feel tears drop onto my chest, I flip us over so he is now underneath me and our eyes meet.
I lean down and kiss his lips as I wipe the silence tears pooling in his eyes.
" Baby talk to me, I need to know how you are feeling?".
" I feel really frightened, I know what your job entails and I try not to think about the bad side of it, but to see it with my own eyes was terrifying, why did those men have to died?".
" Baby, I know your are frightened but remember I will not let anyone harm you, those men rolled over on us and I had to find out everything I could to find out what is going on, who was behind the blatant attack on us".
" I was so scared walking into that room, but I woke up and you were not there And I needed you, I had a bad nightmare about Mark , then to have to go down those stairs again brought it all back and I had to run and hide".
" I am sorry I wasn't there for you baby, I thought I would be able to get the job done and be back to you before you woke".
" I am sorry I turned away from you".
" I am sorry I wasn't there for you" I say kissing his lips gently.
" I love you" I say placing another kiss on his lips.
" I love you more".
" Not  possible baby".
I flip us over again and hold Lou across my chest.
" Never fear me baby you know I would never harm you in any way".
I hear a sigh leave his body as he puts his head up.
" I know that, all I want to do right now is just to lay in your arms, just hold me please, hold me tight".
I bring my arms around him and pull him as close as I can against my chest.