Her Mafia Brothers

BROKEN DAMON

"It was warranted," Damon insisted.

"No," Alex growled. "You went too far."

"She snuck into the left wing," Damon reminded both of us. "I don't have to tell you how dangerous that is. It could mean her death." Damon shook his head sadly. "I don't tolerate blatant disobedience anyway, but that..... That went beyond blatant disobedience. She could have been killed, Alex!"

I let out a strangled cry and buried my face in Alex's shirt. I could have been killed? Really? What kind of stuff went on in the left wing? Was I not even safe in my own home?

Neither Damon nor Alex spoke. Instead, they were glaring at each other, some kind of weird power contest or something. Eventually, Alex broke eye contact with Damon and looked down.

Damon extended his hand to me. "Come on," he said gently. "I'll get some arnica gel for you. It will help with the bruising."

He led me up his bedroom and left me standing there in the black-themed bedroom while he went into his bathroom and came out holding a tube.

"This is arnica gel," he told me. "Lie down on the bed, on your tummy. Do you want to put it on or do you want me to do it? Or I can get Alex to do it if you'd rather."

I shook my head. "No. You. Please."

He nodded. He looked far more somber than I'd ever seen him. He looked sad, almost. Almost as though seeing the damage he'd inflicted on my butt had broken him.

Nervously, I lay down on Damon's bed.

I clenched his blankets tightly as he slid my pants down. His touch was gentle as he liberally applied the cool gel to my tender butt. It helped, though. The arnica gel soothed it immediately.

"Fix your pants," he told me in a rough voice as he returned to his bathroom.

By the time he came back, I had fixed my clothing and was sitting gingerly on the edge of his bed.

He came and sat down beside me, turning my face to look at him.

"We are involved in very dangerous things Carrie, and it's very important that you follow the rules I have set in place for you, otherwise we can't keep you safe." He spoke softly, but looked at me sternly.

I probably should have just nodded and agreed with him, but after seeing Alex's reaction in the kitchen, I was too angry.

"So you're saying it was my fault I was nearly raped? Because it wouldn't have happened if I'd followed the rules?" I yelled, blinking back the tears that stung my eyes.

"No Carrie, I-"

"Because he told me I was asking for it!" I screamed at him, interrupting him. "He said....." I hiccuped. "He said that he was watching me in my bikini, and I can't tell him I didn't want it, dressed like that." I whispered the last words, before breaking into sobs, but Damon must have understood them because he gathered me up in his arms and held on tightly.

"No my girl, that's not what I'm saying at all. I would never, ever say that," he growled. That was not your fault. Abuse is never the fault of the victim. He could have got you anywhere. You deserve to be safe in your home and I let you down. The only thing you did wrong was going into the left wing where you know you're not allowed to go. Him attempting to rape you is on him, not you. Never you, sweet Carrie-girl. Do you hear me?"

I nodded, but Damon carried on like he didn't even notice.

"But you've been punished for breaking the rules, and he's been dealt to for hurting you. But I need you to know that it wasn't your fault. If anything it's mine, firstly for inviting him here, and then for leaving you alone up here asleep without security. I should have put Paul outside your door but I thought you would be safe because we were all here. I'm so glad Logan's friend saw him and said something. I'm so sorry I let you down, Carrie. I'm so, so sorry."

If I didn't know better, I'd think Damon was crying. He had his head in his hands and his shoulders shook and his voice sounded broken.

I've broken him. I've broken my big, scary brother who is always in control and is the most powerful man I know.

I wrap my arms around him, wanting him to know I don't blame him at all for what happened. It wasn't his fault I nearly got raped. I don't know whose fault it was, exactly, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't his. Just like it wasn't mine.

I don't like seeing him like this. I need to know he's still in control. Because if he's not, I don't feel safe. If Damon isn't in control, it feels like my whole world will fall apart.

He hugs me back, so tightly. Tighter than he's ever held me before.

"Owwww," I moan softly. "You're squishing me!"

Damon lets me go then and chuckles, a sound I love so much.

"Sorry sweetheart. Are you okay?"

I nod. I am okay, I truly am. Now that Damon is back to his normal self, I know that everything will be okay.

"Shall we go downstairs?" he asks, standing up and extending his hand to me. "The rest of the boys should be finished in the gym by now, and Jack will be back soon. We're yours, for the rest of the day."

I take his hand, but then step in close for another quick hug. For some reason, I need the reassurance and security that my oldest brother offers.

Together, we walk down the stairs and out onto the patio, where Rocco is sprawled out on a lounger. He looks up as we come outside, and pats the lounger before opening his arm out to me, inviting me to sit with him.

"How you doing, sis?" he asks, as I lower myself gently to lie next to him. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me in close. I love this affectionate side of Rocco. I think I'm the only one he shows it to.

"I'm okay," I say. "Better, now that I'm with you."

"Aw. You're such a sweet girl, sis. You sure you're a Bogiatto?"

"Yes," I insist. "Now cuddle me. I need lots of cuddles today."
"Ah, there it is, your bossy side. Proof that you're a Bogiatto, after all."