[M] Star Lost || Changlix

13 - an apology needed

Felix's POV:

October 11

I quickened my step when I saw Changbin at his locker. I haven't talked to him in a few days, mainly because he's been purposefully avoiding me. All I want to do is apologize, but it's difficult to do that when the other person ignores you.

"Changbin..." I called out, making him turn to me. He scoffed and closed his locker, hurrying to zip up his backpack. I grabbed his arm before he could walk away, "W-Wait—"

"Let go of me." He firmly said, glaring at me.

"I owe you an apology..." I quickly said, not knowing when I would be able to talk to him again. He pursed his lips, his eyes slowly starting to soften. This was my chance, "I should've asked you first before I talked to Mrs. Kim. That was really shitty of me. A-And I really had no idea that you would miss soccer practice until you told me. I-I'm really sorry, and wanted to make it up to you so..." I let go of his arm, confident again that he wouldn't run away and ignore me.

I took my backpack off, unzipping the biggest pouch and taking out a container. I looked back up at him, reaching my hands out as I said, "You said you liked the brownies from Chan's birthday, so I made you some more. A-And I didn't know if you were allergic to anything—"

"Thank you..." He quietly said, looking down at the container as he took it from me. He softly smiled when he picked his head up, looking into my eyes as he added, "I think I'm actually the one who owes you an apology..." I scrunched my eyebrows, not understanding where he was going with this, "They gave me special privileges during tests so that I'm not struggling, and so far, it's actually really helped..." He seemed embarrassed, his gaze falling back to the container in his hands, "I wouldn't have done that on my own, so thank you. A-And I didn't mean to yell at you the other day, so I'm sorry."

I smiled from how shy he was being, quietly replying, "It's ok. I won't do it behind your back next time."

He lifted his head up, looking to his left and right before his eyes fell back on me, "Are you gonna be home alone tonight?" He whispered.

I tried my best not to blush since I knew where he was going with this, "Chan is studying at his friend's house after practice and my dad is on another business trip."

He nodded, "Then I'll see you for tutoring after soccer practice..." He said, giving me a little smirk and a wink before backing away from me, "I'm not sharing these by the way." He added, gesturing to the container in his hands.

I bit my lip and chuckled, knowing the heat was rising on my cheeks as he walked away.

. . . . .

"Fuck..." Changbin moaned into my ear as he came undone. He dropped his head into my neck, making me wrap my arms around him. I slid my fingers through his hair, feeling the sweat on his nape as he slowly rode out his climax. He lifted his head up a few moments later, kissing me as he pulled out. He whispered against my lips, "One more time?"

I chuckled, "I'm tired, Binnie. Twice is enough." I replied, worn out and exhausted.

He smiled, "Yeah, I just missed you..." He said, leaning down to kiss my cheek before he added, "Is it nap time?"

I nodded as he took the condom off, tying it before throwing it in the trash. He grabbed a few tissues and cleaned me up and then grabbed our underwear from the floor. Changbin tossed me mine, both of us slipping them on. He grabbed his jeans to put back on, but I was too lazy to get up. I turned on my side instead, grabbing the blanket we had pushed aside and hugging it.

I was about to close my eyes, but I heard Changbin snicker at me, "I think the blanket is supposed to go over you." He said as he zipped up his pants, placing his hands on his hips.

I hummed and closed my eyes, mumbling, "I don't care."

He laughed again, and then I felt a weight sinking down on the mattress. I opened my eyes, seeing Changbin crawl onto the bed and go around to the other side of me. I was confused but stilled when he suddenly hugged me from behind. His arms wrapped around my waist, and he pulled me closer, my back pressing up against his bare chest. I could feel his muscles, safe and secure as he held me like this. He's never done this before, but I wasn't about to complain.

He gently took the blanket from my hold and draped it over me instead. He kissed my nape and slid his arm around my waist again, whispering, "Better?"

I smiled, humming in response. We just stayed like that for a few minutes, neither of us needing to say anything. I tried to bask in the moment, closing my eyes and feeling the warmth coming from him.

He rubbed over my stomach, "Can we hang out sometime? L-Like, as friends."

I opened my eyes, pursing my lips as I replied, "Why?"

"I feel like I know nothing about you."

"Well, the feeling is mutual."

"I just wanna try and get to know you. I mean, wouldn't you wanna get to know the person you fuck on a regular basis?"

I opened my eyes and rolled onto my back, looking at him as I said, "What's the difference between that and dating?"

He raised an eyebrow, "First of all, I'm not gay. Second of all, there's no feelings attached."

I internally rolled my eyes, "Right..." I mumbled, "Why even bother hanging out then?"

He sighed, "Come on, I'm trying to be nice..." He pursed his lips, looking into my eyes as he said, "A-And I haven't had the best week so, umm... Thank you for this. And the brownies were really good."

He tilted his head down and lightly kissed my shoulder, smiling at the warm feeling of his lips against my skin. He always knows how to reel me right back in, "I have been wanting to see the new Queen movie."

He tilted his head back up to me, smiling as he asked, "Bohemian Rapsody?"

I nodded, "Wanna come see it with me?"

Changbin nodded in response and then went quiet. He looked at me for a few seconds before closing his eyes and snuggling closer to me. I smiled, feeling his nose against the crook of my neck as he tightened his hold around my torso. I placed my hand over his forearm, which was resting across my stomach. I noticed the scratches that were there, just like after the party. It made me scrunch my eyebrows, tracing the marks with my index finger, "Bin?"

"Hmm?" He hummed in response, and I was still gently tracing over the scratches on his skin. Either it was so gentle that he couldn't feel it, or he's just ignoring it.

"What happened to your arm?" I asked, genuinely curious.

He moved his head a little, like he needed to look to make sure we were talking about the same thing. He hesitated for a moment, and the silence was worrying me. Changbin put his head back into my neck before he replied, "Nothing."

I raised an eyebrow, "It looks like you fell on the pavement or something—"

"I said it's nothing..." He cut me off, his voice a little more stern than before. He sighed right after that, "J-Just don't worry about it, ok?"

I pursed my lips, anxious about what he said. I decided to push it away, quietly saying, "Just know you can tell me anything." As I placed my hand over the marks, rubbing my thumb over his skin.

He nodded against my neck, feeling his warm breath against my skin, "I know."

I turned my head a little, kissing his forehead before closing my eyes. I was still worried about him, but I didn't want to push him to talk to me. I gently rested my head on his, cautiously bringing my hand up to place on his shoulder. I just absorbed where I was for a moment, telling myself it was reality instead of a dream. I only wish he wasn't so scared to do this with me freely.

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

- Eleanor Roosevelt