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Grocery shopping felt different now since I wasn't buying two gallons of milk or countless chocolate bars

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Grocery shopping felt different now since I wasn't buying two gallons of milk or countless chocolate bars. This staying alone thing was going to be difficult.

Kong had picked up the last of his things yesterday, and after a promise to call each other every day he was gone. It almost was like he was never there. Save for the memories of course. Like the dent in the wall from when he'd come home angry at Pat because of something she'd said. Or the tear on the couch from the time he thought he could give me a haircut.

My heart clenched and I clutched the steering wheel harder, taking a sharp right.

This really felt like starting all over. Only this time, Kong wouldn't be living with me and I didn't have James as a boyfriend. Though I did have my parents, and Pat, and Kong even though he was miles away. And Adam.

He'd invited me to another rugby game this weekend. I guess everything was back to normal. Kinda.

I pulled into the parking lot of my apartment building and brought the car to a stop. After taking out everything I'd gotten from the grocery store, I shut the door by bumping my hip against it and headed into the building.

I tapped the paper bag I was holding, listening to the awful elevator music and wondering if Kong would get over his fear of elevators. Maybe he would but it was most likely that's he'd do it with Pat at his side, not me. I was happy for him though. I was happy for them.

Two days ago, Pat had blasted my phone with multiple texts saying that Kong had asked her to be his girlfriend. Again.

Like I said, if I couldn't get what I wanted, at least I'd be happy that my best friend could.

The elevator dinged when I got to my floor and as the doors parted, I pulled out the keys from my back pocket. I began towards my apartment with my heart racing. It always did whenever I came home and not because I was really looking forward to living alone, but because I was hoping to bump into James.

We wouldn't need to say anything to each other. I just wanted to see him. Just once. It was a stupid wish, but it was what I wanted. What was unbelievable was the fact that I was still pining over my ex like a moron.

As I approached my door, a small voice in my head reminded me of how terribly it had gone last time when I'd acted on my feelings towards James. Another voice asked if I'd do it again.

Would I?

I came to a stop in front of my door and spun around to stare at James'. It was almost funny, how I'd dreaded him living in the same apartment building as me and now, all I wanted was-

His door swung open, and he stood there. Holding a cardboard box. Eyes widening on seeing me.

-to see him.

Guess I got what I wanted. Now all I had to do was turn away and head into my room... Right after I stilled my racing heart. Could he heart it, My heart beating? Could he feel how thick the air had gotten? Not from tension or anger or hate like it's been between us, from something else. Something foreign. Something so scary, it excited me.

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