Fix You

Chapter Nine

I want to tell mommy. I can't. He'll hurt her. He'll hurt me.

How much longer will this last? I don't normally play games this long. It's weird.

I hate this game. It hurts. I don't like it when we play. I want him to stop.

It was bad the last time. I told him I didn't want to play. He didn't listen. My wrists are bruised. I'm sore.

He knocks on the door. I hide under the bed.

"I know you're there, Emma," he hisses. He staggers into the room. I smell beer. He's drunk. "Come on out, let's play a game."

I'm too scared. I don't move. If he catches me, I know we'll have to play. And he's had beer. It'll be worse.

"Emma," he coos.

I want to scream. I cover my mouth so he can't hear me. He looks in the closet. He shouts, "EMMA!"

He goes towards the bed. He looks under. I gasp. "

There you are, baby girl. Now we can play." He grabs my arm.

He yanks me out from under the bed, and I scream.

        

I turned the hot water off, squeezing the excess water out of my hair as I exit the shower. I quickly towel-dried my hair and my body.

I wrapped my now-damp towel around me, my thoughts still racing from my confession the day before. The most intoxicating thing was that Carter had actually said it back and felt the same; that was what made it so unbelievable to me.

I opened my bathroom door, going to my dresser. I rummaged through it, looking for some clothes. My thoughts were still going wild. I didn't think it was possible to fall in love with someone after a little less than a month. I wasn't one of those girls who thought you should throw out "I love you" to any guy; I thought you should save it for someone special so that it meant something. But, I couldn't control my feelings. I was hopelessly, utterly in love with him. And, it confused me to no end.

Someone suddenly cleared their throat. I gasped in shock, turning around sharply. I clutched my towel tighter to my body, and relaxed slightly when I saw it was just Carter sitting on my bed. His eyes moved over my nearly-exposed body. I blushed, looking away.

"What are you doing in here?" I asked, still refusing to look at him.

"I'm sorry; I assumed that you took your clothes in there, and I wanted to talk to you." He looked at my body for a few more seconds more before tearing his eyes away, focusing on the ground. "I'll leave you to get dressed."

As he stood and moved towards the door, I suddenly said, "Stop." My mind didn't even process it; the words were out before I could even truly think about what I was saying.

His head snapped up, eyes meeting mine. "Stop," I repeated, more conscious of my words.

I closed my eyes, my body shaking somewhat. I murmured, "If we're eventually going to have sex, which I do want to do in the future, I need to feel comfortable with you seeing me. All of me."

His eyes searched my face. "I want that too, more than anything... but I don't think you're ready for that."

I shook my head. "You got over a big fear of yours yesterday by saying you love me. I think I owe you the same curtesy."

"You shouldn't do this because you feel obligated; you should do it because you genuinely want to."

"I do," I assured him.