Brighter Than The Stars: Book One

𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝒯𝒽𝒾𝓇𝓉𝓎-𝒯𝒽𝓇𝑒𝑒: 𝐵𝓇𝑜𝓀𝑒𝓃 𝒫𝓇𝑜𝓂𝒾𝓈𝑒𝓈

For a moment in time, when a knock sounded on the front door of the hotel room, she thought it would be Elijah coming back to her. He'd have tears in his eyes, telling her he was wrong. He'd tell her the love he felt for her could overcome any obstacle. That he'd never wanted children before until she came back into his life and opened up a world of possibilities. Their love was the remedy to every issue he worried about. She could fix him; every broken piece.

It was a fantasy world; and not just because it wouldn't happen, but because it couldn't.

Still, Madeline hadn't expected to find her father on the other side of the door. Only one part of her fantasy came to life. He had tears in his eyes.

"Elijah called me last night before he left," he told her as he stepped into the room. "Wanted to make sure I'd be able to drive you home at the end of the weekend. Wouldn't tell me anything else, but I'm guessing by you looking like death, it's not good."

Madeline didn't doubt for a second she looked like death. At least when he left the first time, she'd been able to succumb to her own exhaustion. This time, she hadn't been so lucky. Just when she thought the tears had run out, they'd show right back up again. There were even a few minutes when she thought she was having a heart attack. "Remember at dinner when you told him he couldn't knock me up before I graduated?"

Her dad tipped his head, narrowing his brown eyes at her. "Yeah?"

"He doesn't want children. Ever." The words cut into her all over again, reminding her of all the words he'd spoken after that. "When he told me that, he could see that I wanted them eventually, and that's when he realized that as much as our paths have been leading toward one another for years, they were going to be heading in two completely different directions. Elijah felt like if we ended things now, it would save us some heartbreak later, but I don't feel like it has saved me any heartbreak."

The words had stumbled out of her mouth, some likely on top of each other as she attempted to rip off the band-aid, just as he'd done the night before. If Madeline had, by some miracle, spoken the words in order, the blubbering coming out at the same time probably didn't help to make them any more coherent.

His father's arms wrapped around her. "So, he's gone? Again?"

Madeline wasn't entirely certain how much of the conversation last night she'd actually taken in. A buzzing down would enter her brain as he spoke, coming and going while only letting bits and pieces fully register. But the full explanation of his absence was in the letter, not the words spoken aloud, so she pointed at the pages she'd moved to the bedside table.

Unlike his last letter, Madeline hadn't read it over and over. Her heart wasn't able to take it this time around.

Her dad looked where she'd pointed, then walked over to it, his steps timid and tired. Madeline watched as he read it. The tears in his eyes didn't take long to fall, and after the first minute, they were pouring down almost as hard as her own were.

"I never told you this, but I was engaged to someone else before I met your mother. She was my college sweetheart, and my first big love. We got halfway through planning the wedding when I brought up us having kids. Somehow, the conversation was never brought up before, but that's when I found out she didn't want children.

"We tried to find a middle ground. Only having one, or maybe she'd feel differently later on, but once I opened my eyes and realized I was talking in circles, we broke it off. It was something she'd never want, and a gift I knew I couldn't deprive myself of.

"I want to be angry at him," her dad confessed. "I want to drive over to his place, and shake some goddamn sense into him. But if the two of you want different things for your future, if you want something he can't bring himself to give you, then he's right. There's no middle ground in this, Maddie."

Madeline nodded as her body shook, and she'd wrapped her arms around herself in a false effort to make her feel safe or comforted.

"He brought up staying in your life, being your friend. Do you think you can settle for a friendship with him?"

This time, her head shook the other way. It was an impossible thing to say aloud, but Madeline knew having the love of her life remain forever just out of reach. It would kill her in a slow, painful death.

"We were making all these plans," Madeline told him through shaky breath. "We had plans. He was going to meet Chloe, and put Marty in his place. We were going to enjoy the winter festival together, then have our first date on Saturday. We had our whole fucking Christmas mapped out.

"Twenty-four hours ago, we were sleeping in each other's arms. Dad, I had him back. We had each other for almost two fucking weeks. I fell in love with him over thirteen fucking days. I had him. Every piece of his heart, I had him. And now he's gone. He fucking left me here. I have the family waiting at the house. I have to face everyone."

Her dad dropped the papers from his grasp and pulled Madeline into an embrace once more. "Do you want me to drive you back home now? I don't want you to be alone, but you shouldn't be forced to celebrate, either."

Madeline pulled away from her father just enough to look at him, her vision blurry from the tears. "That's a five hour drive round-trip. I can't ask you to do that. You'll miss dinner."

"Might as well just spend the night at your place, huh?" Her dad told her, forcing a smile onto his face. "That way, you don't have to be alone, and I won't have to worry about you."

She nodded her agreement. Yes, Madeline just wanted to be left alone, but that big house, with everyone gone for the holiday, would feel all the more empty. Too empty. She needed someone to fill the silence so she wouldn't stay trapped in her own thoughts.

"Get your things together, then. We'll stop at the house so I can pack a bag, then we'll hit the road." Her dad's arms fell from her body, and he stepped away. "You are going to survive this, Maddie. I know it's not the same as last time. This time, your heart was all in in every way imaginable, but you will survive, because you're a fighter."

Madeline wasn't sure if she believed those words.

"I asked him. A week ago, I asked him to promise me he wouldn't leave again. I worried that I'd expect more of him than he could give, and it would scare him off. You know what he told me? He said that there was nothing I could ever ask of him he wouldn't be willing to give. Elijah lied. He lied right to my face."

"He hadn't meant to, Maddie. He told you that when it was only a friendship, and I truly believe there is nothing you could ask for as his friend that he wouldn't be willing to give. But relationships play by a different set of rules. I think you two just found the one thing he couldn't give you, M&M, which is the one thing you want for your future, besides him.

"Get your things together, and we'll spend the worst holiday imaginable with each other."