Oblivion Of The Heart

Chapter 20 - Still smitten

Chapter 20 - Still smitten

"What?" Esperanza furrowed her eyebrows. "Why do you look so surprised?"

"Are you... Qing ShenWu's sister?" He asked cautiously. How could he not be wary when the person in front of him was the sister of the person who killed him. But he felt guilty. He has been with her for years, yet now just a little different and he's like this? He doesn't deserve to say that he likes her. The name hit hard at Esperanza. No matter how much her previous life's memory turns blurry, she can never forget their names.  Names of the people who she devoted herself to.

"Yes." She looked away with her heart aching. "He's... my second brother. Do you know him?"

Not anymore.

She reminded herself. But she still could not get rid of this feeling over all these years.

"How could I not know him!" Morto sighed exasperatedly. "After all, he's my rival."

Rival?

The part triggered a memory. She recalled her second brother cursing someone named... Hu Jie. She recalled that day. She recalled the greatest crime ever in her life.

"Are... are you that Hu Jie?" Her voice shook. "The person second brother killed?"

"Yes." He said, but then he looked at her astonished. "How did you know? ShenWu sure would be cautious enough to cover his crime, then how do you know?"

"I..." She took a deep breath, closed her eyes for a second, and opened them. "The crime was not hidden.... it was revealed. And then second brother was sent to jail." She lied. She was no longer running away. The confidence which she lost ages ago... she had to build it up again.

"Oh, a perfect ending for a person like him." He sighed. "Uh... by the way, can we come onto why I called you here?" He asked. She nodded her head and he smiled, his heart racing every second.

"Esperanza... I like you." He said, his cheeks flushing red. He was surprised to see that she was not stunned at all. Then the reason struck him. "Did you know it... all the time along?"

"Yes, I did." She said. How could she not have, after experiencing love herself? But the problem here was not Morto liking her, but that Morto was misunderstanding his feelings. 

"My friend, I have a question for you. Who do you really like? Esperanza, or Qing Lin?" She asked him. Morto flinched. Seeing straight into her eyes, he still could not believe it. That the person in front of him was the introverted girl which whom he often crossed paths across. And if she was really Qing Lin... the old rumors came back to him. The rumors of her liking someone else. She liked Zhang Wei..... He shook his head to disperse those memories. The question right now was, whether he liked Esperanza or Qing Lin. To him, both of them were different people. If were to choose one.... won't it be none other than Esperanza?

No, that would do injustice to her real self. I...

He didn't know how to respond. He didn't want to disappoint her. He didn't want to break her heart, break their friendly relationship. Esperanza sighed when she saw her friend all nervous and puzzled.

"You would choose Esperanza, won't you?" She asked him, and he was silent. "Look here, if you really love me, you would be ready to accept my self; both of my selves. To you, Esperanza and Qing Lin would be one, not different persons. You're just betraying your feelings, Morto."

Morto lowered his head in shame and bit his lower lip.

"But it's fine because you're young and immature. Even if you have lived two lives, you never fell in love. It's okay to misunderstand your feelings. As for me... I'm already experienced. You must know that, right?" She said and Morto nodded his head.

"So... what was the feeling I felt all along?" He asked her. 

"I don't know, because I'm not you. But if I were in your place, I'd just feel happy, blissful. Simple feelings when you have a friend to rely on. Nothing more. Love is more complicated than you can imagine." She explained. "I do hope.... you can realize who you truly love. Though, I guess it's going to take a while." She smiled, recalling a sweet little girl with green eyes.

"Then... still friends?" He asked nervously while fiddling his hands.

"Yes. What a silly question. Did I ever say we were no longer friends?" She sighed. Morto brightened up and giggled happily. He kept on talking about his previous life, to which Esperanza could only helplessly listen.

"It's time. I'm going back." She said as she stood up. As she turned around to walk away, Morto abruptly asked a question.

"Do you...... still like him? I mean, do you still like Zhang Wei? Or did you move on?" He asked. She turned around with a cold expression, which startled Morto, and said, "No, I moved on ages ago." With that, she left. When she entered her room, she locked her door, slid down on the floor, and laughed.

"Moved on ages ago? What a funny lie I made up......In the end...  no matter how many years pass... I'm still in love with him..."

I'm still so smitten with him that I can't believe myself.

A/N: The new cover of my story has been created by @YungNightAce. Heartiest thanks to him for this wonderful art!