[✓]My Fiancé is in Love with My Little Sister

Chapter 38

If this is the real end – 21

“It’s too late, the calamity and misfortune are already happening,” was what I answered him in a far, very far away life. But in fact, I didn’t really remember when that misfortune had started. The beginning of my repeating lives was always the tea party where Soleil was introduced to Silvia. That’s why I had thought like this.
           
The beginning of everything was that tea party.
           
If exactly as Marianne had said, there were in life events that couldn’t be avoided, then that tea party could be counted among their numbers. Because at this point in time where the tea party unfold, I, who didn’t know I was a person with the unique characteristic of always repeating the same time again and again, inevitably introduced them to each other. In other words, it was because their encounter was inevitable that it could be called fate. It was also at that moment I would realize fate was something which could not be changed.

“… … Ilya-sama?”

Marianne who was about to leave the room turned back. The door was opened and a maid of our house was waiting there, looking toward us. I also saw the servant Marianne had brought along with her.

“… Ah, no, no I am fine.”

She had only called out my name but when I looked at her face I realized she was worried for me. Even though she was shaking her head, I already had one foot out of the bed. It was an action I made, urged by a feeling of uneasiness. “… What happened to you?” she asked me but my heart was gradually beating faster and faster, and I lost my calm. In an incoherent muttering, I repeated “I am fine,” but I tumbled and fell from the bed. “My lady!” Reacting quicker than Marianne who tried to help me, the maid rushed in the room in a fluster. While I was still on my knees, clinging to the maid who was trying to help me up, I asked her, “…Silvia is?” Although it was a maid attached to my service, we had never talked beyond necessary. That’s why she made an expression as if I had just spoken cryptic words. I simply wanted to ask her where was my little sister, but by just saying her name my intention wasn’t transmitted. Once again, I tried to repeat the same question, by I realized the inside of my mouth was dried up and parched.

“If this is hell. If you’re receiving your punishment. Then, what kind of sin did you commit?”

Crow’s voice echoed inside my head. Since this life never went well even if I repeated it, I had concluded that maybe, there was no point, no meaning in returning back in time. The one who created a stir and raised a question about this way of thinking was him. And then, the me at that time thought like this.
           
… … I wanted to find happiness. I dreamed of a life I could spent together with my beloved person. In other words, it was the same as tearing apart the two persons who had been tied together by fate.
           
It was the same as wishing for someone’s unhappiness. I was convinced this was exactly what started the beginning of this hell. However, this was no more than the guess I made myself, I, a person whose head was thrown in disorder and despaired because of my repeating lives.

“Why is it happening to you and you alone?”
“Why is it only you that repeat the same time?”

The overlapping whispers, like a phantom’s voice, pushed me into a corner.

“Silvia is, right now, where is she?”

These last few days, I couldn’t leave my bed, so I quite couldn’t pour strength in my legs. “… Silvia-sama?” The young maid who looked at me at point-blank range frown. Then, she shook her head, her shoulders a little stiff, “I do not know.” She may have been ordered to not say anything so that Silvia and I won’t come in contact. The maid’s arm I was gripping was obviously tense.