Welp, folks. It seems as if I, Experionu have hit what the pros call 'writers block'. With all the must I could muster in my dark, smelly room I could not come up with an idea for tonight's chapter. So, like any other logical straight white suburban boy would do, I googled the entire question "I'm running out of ideas for my blog please help" and got the specific answers I knew Google™ would provide me. God bless you, Google.™
Alright, let's run through these ideas our lord and savior Google™ has provided.
1.) Makeup Tutorial
Oh. Okay. That's alright, of course they would want to include some more feminine things up here but I'm sure they'd balance out the gender roles. Let's move on.
2.)Review your favorite superwholock episodes.
Oh. Um. Oh. Well, this was a dark phase of my past that I am not willing to dive back into, but y'now. I can understand. They gotta get those demographics, amirite?
3.)Sacrifice 69 blood goats to our lord and savior, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and post a picture.
Finally, dear lord I was worried we wouldn't get a good, realistic one. That was close. Check the media.
4.) Do an interactive activity with your followers!
Okay guys, here's what you're going to do. Everybody write one word in the comments of this chapter. I will make a story out those words, using each one at least once in a paragraph. Most likely will be included in the 1K reads special, which this story will most likely garner. I'll probably regret this.
Authors note- I had just finished this chapter and was about to publish it. But like. It deleted the rest of the chapter. Oops.
5.) Share your successes in life.
This one time, I chugged an entire gallon of milk. To be fair, my friend was throwing eggs at me for encouragement and I threw up twice, but this is still an achievement I am very proud of.
6.)Debunk a myth.
Okay, I have just the thing for this section. So, we all know of 9/11. A very sad time, being the highest casualty American soil terrorist attack of all time. But, did you know, Bush did 9/11? Jet fuel can't melt steel beams. Confirmed.
7.) List some fun facts about yourselves that would endear your readers towards you and give them something to relate to.
Fact 1.) I go BANANAS for bananas! They are my favorite fruit, by far.
Fact 2.) i am sexually attracted to infants
Fact 3.) When I was about 6, I was OBSESSED with the movie Alladin.
Fact 4.) I hear voices in my head. I don't know what language they're in, but sometimes it gets so loud I have to pray the sin away
Fact 4.) Up until a couple months ago, I didn't know how to pronounce 'gluten' correctly. I've been saying 'glutton' my entire life. Stupid!
Fact 5.) I am addicted to listerine. I cannot go to sleep without downing an entire pint of that sweet, sweet listerine.
Fact 6.) You didn't notice that I did fact #4 twice! lol xD
Fact 7.) I killed a man in 2008
Authors note- I just realized I've been doing this all in bold. How BOLD, amirite?!??! LOLOLOOOL xDDDDD
Okay. I feel like that's been enough. I hope you enjoyed tonight's selection. Thank you for reading, and please do not tell the police.
Bye.
