When We Were Young

Apology

Your eyes fluttered open and shut as you adjusted to the light that was streaming through the windows. You looked around and your small movements had Steve quickly looking to you from the book he was reading.

"What happened?" You asked, groaning from the pain in your abdomen.

"You were shot."

You turned towards the voice to see your brother sitting on the other side of you.

"Who did it?" You questioned, your brows pulling together in question.

"We don't know," Steve replied.

"All we know is they had terrible aim," Bucky added, trying to lighten the mood.

You watched Bucky and Steve, not saying a single word. They were both acting off and it made you suspicious.

"Y/N?" Bucky asked, interrupting your thoughts.

"Why me?"

"Whatever happened with the stone probably," Steve replied.

"Why kill me? Why—," you paused for a moment. "Steve?"

"Hmm?" He hummed.

"How would anybody know that anything had happened to me other than the team? I thought it was just us that knew."

Steve looked to Bucky and it made you even more suspicious.

"What aren't you telling me?" You demanded.

"Word got out," Bucky said softly.

"Bucky, stop," Steve interrupted.

"No, she deserves to know," Bucky countered, his eyes narrowed at Steve before turning to you. "Tony and Bruce needed help to see what is going on when all of this first happened to you. They called upon friends and word got out about your condition and you were quickly labeled as dangerous and a threat."

"That's why you kept me locked up in the tower," you whispered to yourself.

"Yes," Steve said quietly. "We wanted to keep you safe. I'm sorry."

"It's too late to apologize, Steve," you snapped.

"Having you go home was a risk none of us wanted to take but you were adamant," Bucky added.

"Then why not tell me the truth?"

"I wanted you to try to live a normal life— the life I know you had always wanted. Your own home surrounded by family. We didn't know that this would happen," Bucky replied. "I thought I was protecting you."

"So because of what I've become against my own will, I'm being hunted?" You asked, your face pained.

"Look who's awake," a doctor said as she walked into the room. "How are you feeling?"

"Not so great," you replied with a sigh.

"I have some good news and some bad news," she replied. "Good news is you're all patched up and we had few complications."

"What's the bad news?" You asked, your brows pulling together.

The doctor sighed and sat near your feet, a deep frown forming on her lips as her brows pulled together.

"We did what we could but the bullet that pierced your lower abdomen really tore you up," she replied. "Y/N, we lost your baby."

You sucked in your breath as you took in the doctors words, repeating them to yourself in your head.

"Y/N?" She repeated your name.

"I, uh, I heard you," you replied as you stared at your hands in your lap as Steve moved his hand to your forearm.

"You did sustain some pretty severe damage to your reproductive organs. We did our best but it's unlikely you'll ever be able to have a child."

"Okay," you whispered and the doctor gave a nod before leaving.

"What do you need?" Bucky asked.

You shook your head, still trying to process what the doctor had told you.

"Y/N? Can you say something?" Steve said softly.

"I need to tell Thor," you muttered almost inaudibly as your eyes began to fill with tears.

"To hell with Thor," Steve replied almost angrily. "What about me? That could've been my child!"

"Now we don't have to worry about me anymore," you muttered. "You don't need to worry if I'm going to Asgard anymore but he has a right to know too, Steve!"

Your nostrils flared and hands balled into fists as your eyes began to turn a color that could only be described as peacock blue.

"What's happening to you?" Bucky asked as he rightly gripped your arm.

You clenched your jaw and the color deepened.

"Get out and get Thor," you shouted at Steve and Bucky. "Now!"

A small blast threw both men back in their chair and shattered the windows that were closest to the three of you.

"And I don't want to see either of you again until I speak to him," you screamed. "Get out!"

Bucky and Steve looked at one another in shock before looking back to you. Steve left and your brother reluctantly followed behind him.

When the pair left, nurses flooded your room and soon after your doctor had come back in as well to check on you.

"How far along was I?" You questioned as you fought back tears.

"About twenty weeks," she doctor replied as she sat at your bedside. "We did everything we could. I'm so sorry."

You nodded and after a long silence, the doctor got up and left your room. Not long after, nurses had moved you to a new room with no broken windows.

Within an hour, Thor was at your bedside and you both sat in silence.

"Why did you ask me to come here?" Thor finally questioned, breaking the silence.

"I lost the baby," you said in an almost whisper. "I lost any ability to have kids ever again."

Tears began to fill your eyes but you kept your eyes away from Thor.

"I'm so sorry, Thor," you cried. "I'm so sorry!"

Thor couldn't quite understand why you had been overly apologetic until it hit him.

"The child was mine?"

"Yes," you replied as you broke down into sobs. "I'm so sorry, Thor."

Without another word, he sat on the edge of your bed and gently pulled you into his arms. As you pressed your forehead against his shoulder and sobbed, his fingers tangled in your hair.

From the hallway, Bucky and Steve watched the interaction between you and Thor and Steve was visibly jealous.

"This is not your fault," Thor said as he cradled your head in his hands, his tear filled eyes holding your gaze. "I will find who is responsible for this and they will pay."

You nodded and Thor pressed a kiss to your forehead as the sky darkened and thunder boomed outside.

"I will return to check on you," he said as he stood and quickly wiped his stray tears away.

The god turned and left without another word, the only sound being a loud crack of thunder upon his exit.