Fight For Me

Chapter 17

When Merlin wakes, he thinks he's dreaming. This is because he sees Arthur curled up, asleep, at his bedside, with his hand holding Merlin's. So, obviously, this can't be real and is one of Merlin's cuter, sweeter, and more PG fantasies. Regardless of it not being real, he grins, because even if this will never happen, it feels good anyway.

He tries to remember the events of the past few days, which seem to come up as blanks. Something about...

Oh. Yes. Sigan.

Then it hits him like one of the many things Arthur throws at his head.

But it simply can't be real... Can it?

Arthur. Kissing... him?

No, no, absurd. A dream. Fantasy. Not real. Nothing more than a dream. Surely?

But, Arthur... kissing him?

Arthur... liking him?

Even if it were real, which it's not, he obviously only did it to stop Merlin from destroying Camelot.

"I just saved Camelot," he recalls his-- no, no, the - prince saying. That's why. The only reason. Camelot. Camelot comes first, after all.

Merlin gasps under his touch. Arthur tries to pull away, when Merlin leans into the kiss, pulling Arthur back before he has the chance to move away completely.

See, he wanted to get away. He pulled back. He tried to get away, but Merlin wouldn't let him.

Their bodies press together, Arthur's arm finding a place around Merlin's waist, holding him firmly.

Caught up in the moment, obviously. Imagining him as... Gwen, or something. Couldn't be him. Obviously not. No way. Merlin has long since come to terms with the fact he can never have Arthur, and he's willing to just serve him. This whole thing will need to be cleared out of the air when he wakes up.

It's just then that Arthur gives a cute little snore. Merlin tries to hold back his smile (though he doesn't know why, no ones around) but ends up grinning like the Cheshire cat. He subtly pulls his hand from Arthur's, thinking Arthur will be mad if he sees that.

Arthur heaves a sigh, then opens his eyes. He seems to note Merlin's hand pulling away, and Merlin swears he sees disappointment on his face. But obviously, it wasn't, and he's just being hopeful. Obviously.

"You're awake," Arthur says, softly. "How do you feel?"

Merlin considers this for a moment. How does he feel?

"...Good?" he replies, uneasily.

"That didn't sound very convincing. You are a terrible liar. It's a wonder you managed to hide your magic from me."

Merlin laughs. "Trust me, Gaius and I had thought the same. I thought a million times you'd caught me, but I guess you're just oblivious."

"Excuse me!" Arthur says, insulted. "I am not--"

"Welllll..."

"Shut up, Merlin," Arthur mutters, with what sounds like strong affection behind it, but is definitely just platonic. Totally platonic. If it was even there. Which it wasn't. Because he's seeing things. Or just bad at reading people. Probably both.

"Are you... Is he..." Arthur struggles for the right words. "Is he gone? For good?" His eyes gleam with hope.

"I..." Merlin pauses. "I think so. I can't feel him anymore." Then, Merlin recalls more of last night... Two days ago? Whenever it was.

"It's just... where did he go? How did he go? Was it me who made him leave, or was it him, and if it was him, where is he? He could be in any of you right now and you wouldn't even know. He could be anywhere. And what if he's not gone? What if he's tricking us and--"