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CHAPTER EIGHT: CAN WE KISS FOREVER?
6TH MARCH 2022 - 04:55 PM
"Can I kiss you?"
Aaliyah didn't hesitate to answer me. She whispers, "Yes."
Slowly, gently, I place my hands on her face, scared I'll burn her. Her cheeks were cold, sending shivers down my spine. There was a faint smell of lemon that clung to her body. My eyes close, my thoughts drift, my memories knock knock knocking on my heart. Red spider lilies. My eyes break open. My heart beats differently. I don't understand why I recognised that.
I whisper her name. Just her name. Just one word.
I lower my head and press my lips down to hers, and I'm kissing her until I'm sure I'm dreaming. I drink in her lips with my lips and she tastes like rain and cherries and I'm about to explode. I've only imagined this scene at least a thousand times a day, but now that I'm experiencing it, it was totally different.
My heart is beating so fast I don't understand why it's still working. I'm kissing away the pain, the hurt, the months of guilt, the anger, the loneliness of tomorrow and praying for a future I always pictured of us only together.
She lit me on fire like kerosene; it was difficult to breathe.
We break apart. For a moment, we were just staring at each other, breathing hard until I'm sure I'm blushing, until she closes her eyes and leans her head against my chest. I let out a ragged, steadying breath and wrapped my arms around her.
"I love you," I tell her. "I love you and I don't want you to leave me again."
She's the only reason I'll ever need to stay.
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ACCEPTANCE. (noun). • this stage doesn't mean our grief is over. by understanding the loss has happened, we can't change it - and accepting the loss doesn't mean we feel good about it. • Kubes-Rose describes this stage as a period of calm and peace.
