Complications of Heart

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"What are you doing?" Affan asked in utter confusion as I got down on my knees.

"I am talking. Or gonna start that is." I sassed.

"Uhuh?" he was surely amused for a groom whose 'friend he loves' was on her knees in his room in his wedding that is going to take place in, give or take, 15 minutes.

"So here it goes. I call love a 'train' because people always are running after it. One way or another. They look for it and when they see it on the platform, they just get onto it. No other thought, no other decisions, nothing. And that's what scares me. Or what scared me, cause I am already sprinting towards it." Chuckling a bit to the last part, I didn't let my eyes leave his. My nerves were all over the place, my palms were sweaty, my heart was racing, my ears were ringing and whatnot.

"Gosh, did you feel the same?" I asked him to somewhat pull myself from the trance of panic.

"Every bit of it, Jaan." Pulling up the corners of his mouth, he said.

"So, yeah. Here I am, utterly scared and yet brave as I know what I feel. What I feel for you is what all those love songs and quotes talk about. And that's the afaat."

"That's the afaat, cause they talk about love, and then there is the pain as well that they show for a scene or two. But that's the thing, will I be able to handle the pain? Bear it? As strong as I am, I know when I will fall, I will fall hard. I thought that but you changed it."

"You changed it when you left, more than the pain, mine was a numb sensation. Everything I did was normal, but I knew better. I knew I was missing you because I could bet that if someone asked me 'Does this remind you of him?', the answer would be 'Everything does'. I wish I felt nothing when I heard your name, but I did.".

Finishing up the final bits, my eyes started to blur. Slowly, Affan bent down to my eye level. As absurd as it sounds, I could see him clearly, even in my blurry vision.

"So tell me, why are you here?" whispering the line, his fingertips touched to clear the tears escaping down my cheeks.

"Because it's you. Sirf aur sirf tum." I confessed the deepest corners of my heart.

(It's you. Only you.)

"I wasn't looking for anything, but I found you. I guess that's how relationships build up. With time, I grew closer to you, we spent more time which I looked forward to and that was it. I fell for you, without notice. I fell for you in a way that consumes the whole of me and I don't mind it at all. It was easy. It was simple."

"To answer your question further, Jaan-e-jahaan, you are the one I want to love and to hold when it's cold or for no reason at all. All the good days and bad days, I want you by my side, And I swear to you, I have never been this sure of anything else in my life."

"I love you. I 'train' you." Hammering the nail, I stared at the changes in the irises of the man in front of me.

"So, what do you want, Samreen?"

"I want to be with you, it's as simple and as complicated as that."

Giving me a dazed look, Affan opened his mouth "Why com-"

"Bhai, Kazi Sahib is calling you. Jaldi!"

Glossary:

1. Jaan- An endearment. Literally means "life"

2. Afaat- Mishap

3. Jaan-e-Jahaan- An endearment. Means "love of my world"

4. Bhai- Brother

5. Kazi Sahib- Like a priest in Islam. A civil judge. 

6. Jaldi- Fast