Your Babies | Sano Shinichiro

XL

a/n: a short chapter for today~ we can now start recovering. maybe.

~~~~~

Quickly giving the room a quick scan, a heavy feeling weighs you down, disappointment eating at you along with the familiar feeling of emptiness that you've grown used to over the short period of 3 days.

Kneeling in front of Shinichiro with grandpa, Manjiro and Emma beside you, the four of you all silently bow and listen to every word that each visitor has whispered in front of you.

It is both torture and a form of closure, having to hear everyone's words about Shinichiro. Hearing the many kind words and thoughts about him has surely done something to you, putting your tears at ease but it still leaves you empty inside.

Especially when there's an empty space beside Emma where Izana could be sitting right now.

Letting out a silent sigh, the four of you move to the side in order for the monk to take over the ceremony. All the while, your heads are bowed, hands tightly grasping onto Manjiro and Emma's hands, the two silently crying. The room is quiet, save for the cries of the visitors. You catch the sight of your parents silently sitting by the side, beside them are the kids, Draken, Takashi, Pah-chin, Haruchiyo and Senju. But no Kazutora nor Keisuke.

Their absence reminds you of the things that you still need to do. Reminds you of the court case that needs your time, reminds you of the conversation that still needs to be held with their parents.

It seems there's no end to this cycle that you're stuck in.

Biting your lip to suppress any emotions from showing on your face, you help the two kids stand as the four of you bow to the visitors as they all start filing out of the premises, the ceremony now done which will then lead to Shinichiro's body being brought back to the funeral home for the cremation.

Just as you're about to pull the two kids closer to you, your eyes catch something. Whipping your head to the side, you almost cry out but instead, you gently remove the two kids and guide them to grandpa and the others before excusing yourself.

Running outside, you almost trip as you turn a corner, eyes desperately trying to catch what you had seen earlier.

It almost feels too good to be true when you hear it.

Hear the familiar motor rumbling only a few feet away from you.

Tears immediately brims your eyes, lips trembling as you cry out his name, hands reaching out and trying your best to catch him before he can slip away from you once more. "Wait! Don't go!"

It's cruel, seeing him look at you with such anger and hatred as he turns his back to you. "Izana, wait! Don't g-" Your voice gets cut short after Izana slaps your hand away, lips turned down into a scowl as he glares at you.

It shoots an arrow right through your body, the sting quickly turning into overwhelming pain as the hand that he slapped falls limply by your side.

Maybe it's the shock, maybe it's the sadness.

But your heart hurts.

You have never thought Izana would reject you like this. Never thought there would come a time where the kids that you loved so much would be so repulsed by your touch.

But alas, this isn't about you. This isn't your time to delve in your emotions.

"What do you want? I already visited, didn't I? What more do you need-" Pulling him into your arms, you can't help but bury your face onto his hair, tears slipping past your lids as you shakily smile.

"I'm glad you're here, 'Zana."

Sniffling, you press a kiss on the side of his head, fingers carefully caressing his hair as he continues to sit on his bike, frozen in place. "I'm so relieved to see you her-"

"Why are you making things harder for me, Y/N? Why are you making it seem like I'm wanted here when it's so clear that I don't have a place here?" Izana mumbles, voice cracking ever so slightly. You can feel him try to pull away but you only pull him closer, shaking your head as you press another kiss to his head, eyes shut tight as your tears continue to roll down your cheeks.

"You belong here, 'Zana. They want you here. Emma's waiting for you. Manjiro wants to meet you. Shinichiro and I... we've been trying for so long. For so long, we've planned how we'll finally be able to take you home. Even now, even when he's gone... I'm still here Izana. I'm still here. And I'll do my best to take you home, where you belong..." Letting go of him, you grasp his shoulders, eyes making contact with his even when he tries to look away from you.

"I promise, I'll bring you home-"

"This isn't home... this isn't home, Y/N!" Forcing your hands away from him, you're left standing there, holding in your sobs as you watch Izana angrily point at you. "How can you call this home when you're letting the people who killed Shinichiro stay with you?! Why;d you have to let those people be closer to Shinichiro now even after what they've done for him?!"

Shaking your head at him, you try to hold onto him but he only pushes you away. "It's not like that. They were- it was an accident - they never meant to hurt him, they were just trying to get Manjiro a gift and things were wrong and misunderstandings were mad-"

"You're siding with them..." The sheer disappointment in his voice breaks you as he gives you one last glare before turning away, driving as fast as he can in order to get away from you, his skin crawling with disgust and pain at just hearing you try to defend them. Try to defend the kids that had killed his brother.

Left in the parking lot, you almost fall to the ground if it weren't for someone helping you, tiny hands grasping your arm as they help you to the nearby wall, your hands shaking as you silently cry from what Izana had implied.

It seems as if you've made things worse.

You've only pushed Izana farther away.

"Was that... was that Izana?"

Opening your eyes, you're met with Manjiro's hardened face, lips turned into a scowl as he tightly holds onto your shaking hands, both of you cold to the touch. Wiping your tears away, you nod at him, hands cupping his cheeks even though you're still shaking quite bad.

"Yes... he was quite upset with what I said... it's fine-"

"He made you cry, Y/N-nee." Manjiro grits out, hands curling into fists as he looks at the direction where Izana had left. "You can't just let him do those things. I won't let him. I'll protect you. I'll protect you and Emma and grandpa."

Chuckling, you shake your head, arms wrapping around him. "You don't have to protect me... I'll be the one doing the protecting, alright? Let me protect you... I'll protect all of you."