Only you can save me (A Paul Walker fanfiction)

Chapter Eighteen: So close to that famous happy end

I sighed as I took my coat off. For a moment I didn't see Paul anywhere, but then I saw his head emerge from the water, soon after followed by the rest as he got out of the pool and dried off. It still made me smile to see how fluent that went lately. A lot of months and a lot of frustration later, Paul was finally healed. I don't know how or why, but I had done it. I had started by moving him to another house, selling my vacation house and downscaling to a beach house so he could see the ocean from the living room. I had thought it might help with his morose thoughts, and I think I had been right, even if he never ventured into the open water.

The healing itself was a product of trial and error, none of which he had any idea about. It had gone slow, far too slow to both our liking and we had spent enough afternoons bickering while I gave him physio or made him exercise on the various fitness apparels that I had bought for him. But the darkest period was left behind, and instead we simply started to confide in one another instead of thinking we didn't want to bother the other with our problems. We spent hours hand in hand, going over things. We also learned to tease eachother again, but with all that, it seemed there was one thing very lost to us: we never kissed.

He knew I was unhappily married, I had told him the truth not long after that fateful afternoon and while he was certainly not keeping his thoughts quiet, he didn't push me to a decision. I for myself wasn't sure if he wanted to be with me. His life was waiting for him, if he wanted it and I was, once again, his side dish, ordered to be devoured on the side in the foreseeable future. After all we had been through the thought hurt, but I would be his friend for life, if nothing more. That felt like a good place to be too ...

I smiled as he put his jeans on and walked towards me shirtless. The healing had worked on all the rest faster and for some time now I had been able to look at his body the way I had before the crash: admiring and lusting. His muscles weren't quite back but I didn't mind, his tummy gave way now in a way it never had done before. I had spent a lot of hours lying on it while he played with my hair, watching a movie with him. As friends.

"You're late."

He had a million dollar smile on his face as he sat beside me but the words brought a cloud with them. He would be leaving tomorrow ... I had wanted nothing more for him since I brought him home with me, but now that it was time I wasn't sure I was strong enough. We had talked a lot about it, him saying that life should be bigger than the four walls of the house, and I agreed. Where he would go I didn't know. I think he himself didn't really have an idea ...

"In such a hurry to be away from my hospitality, oh what have I done to deserve that?"

I laughed and glanced at his smile, then we both turned serious. We went over the plan for the next day, I would bring him to downtown and he would first go over to city hall. I knew better than to ask if he had planned to see his family, he had never mentioned them in all the time he was with me, bristling once when I had asked. I hoped for his sake that his return to his old life would go smoothly, and silently vowed to be there to ease any concern and problem as best I could.

"Guess that covers it."

I knew it was a business like reply, but I was once more trying to be composed. I would miss him terribly, I would miss our long talks. I knew he felt like he could no longer rely on me for everything and he was right, of course, but I was losing him a little all the same. Still, worst case scenario, at least he was alive somewhere.

"I better go."

Yes, go, before the waterworks began. I got up and started walking to the door, my eyes already swimming with tears. I heard him get up too.

"You good?"

The phrase was so familiar, so typically him, that I didn't trust my voice and just nodded without turning instead. Then he took my hand and made me face him. And kissed me.

I felt my head start to go light, then put my arms around him as he pulled me closer to him in mine. Oh god yes, please. Who needs air? Breathing is overrated. His hand cupped my face while his other held me close to him. As we pulled away, both slightly breathless, we just looked at eachother. I love you, I love you, I have always loved you I thought, and he kissed my forehead, then moved to my mouth once more.

"Why were you crying, dummy?"

I held him close to me as I told him it was because I was scared I would never see him again. For some reason he found that incredibly funny as he shook with laughter while holding me close. Then he whispered ... I would never leave you. It's been you all along. I didn't reply, just nestled myself against his chest and smiled. I didn't know what life would bring him. But we would find out.

Together.