Crash- Station 19/Marina

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About an hour later Andy came into the room, Maya was sleeping.

"Ciao" Carina said quietly
"Hey, how are you 2 doing?" Andy asked, also quiet, not wanting to wake Maya
"We're ok, she's tired, she woke up earlier because her neck was hurting but after the rest of the tests she got some pain meds. She's been asleep for about 45 minutes this time"
"It's good that she's sleeping. Any updates?"
"She can feel a little bit just below her collar bone and the top of her shoulders but mostly just her neck and head. She couldn't move at all but she was activating some muscles in her shoulders which is a good sign. Obviously we can't test if she can move her neck because her neck needs to stay still"

Carina and Andy talked quietly for a while before Maya woke up.
"Hi" she said when no one saw her open her eyes
"Hey you!" Andy said
"Buongiorno bella"
"Car" Maya said
"I'm right here" Carina said, putting her hand on Maya's head again. Maya smiled at the contact with her wife, Carina had been holding her hand while she slept but Maya had no idea.
"Hi Andy" Maya said "come here, I can't really see you"
"Sorry" Andy said, standing up and walking over so she was directly across from Carina, assuming that was the easiest place for Maya to see people
"It's fine. It just sucks laying flat and not even being able to turn my head. I can mostly just see the ceiling"
"Ya, that would suck" Andy said. "So Mai, Carina told me what you said about Beckett and Sullivan. You need to report them, they were idiots, this could have been avoided and they could have gotten even more people hurt."
"I know they were stupid. Beckett hates listening to me because I was captain and got demoted"
"I can help you with the report but the chief will probably need to talk to you. Are you ok with talking to her?"
"I guess."
"You don't need to do this right now" Carina told her
"Let's just get it over with so I don't have to think about it" Maya said
"Ok" Carina said
"I'll call her and see if she could come today" Andy said, pulling out her phone and walking away from the bed

After a few minutes on the phone and explaining why Maya couldn't come to the office more than once Andy walked over again.
"She's going to come in half an hour"
"Wow, that's soon" Maya said
"Do you want me to stay?" Andy asked
"Ya, I don't want to do this alone. Well Car, I just mean-" Carina cut her off
"I know what you mean, you want someone who understands how it works. I've learned a lot about firefighting from you but I don't know all the rules and politics. I think Andy staying is a good idea"
"Ya. You stay too" she said, a bit worried
"I'm not going anywhere" Carina reassured her. "Even if I'm not touching your head I'm still here, or in the bathroom or the hall talking to someone but I'm always close"
"I know. I just get scared when I can't see you cause I can't look for you and I want to know you're here and be able to feel something. You don't need to be touching me constantly."
"Bambina, if it makes you feel better, I'm happy to do it. And you're not the only one who likes contact, sometimes I need a reminder that you're still here too"
"Kiss?" Maya asks
"Of course" Carina says. Leaning over to kiss her

"And now I'm regretting saying I'd stay!" Andy jokes, making all 3 of them laugh
Maya's laugh is quiet and then she stops and is struggling to breathe. Carina notices immediately
"Andy, can you pass me that suction?" Carina asks, Andy does immediately.
Carina suctions her mouth which helps a bit but she's still not breathing great.
"I'm going to help you get some deep breaths" Carina says
She grabs an ambu bag with a mask, taking the nasal cannula off her face and replacing it with the mask. After a minute she stops and replaces the nasal cannula.
"You ok now?" She asks
"Ya" Maya says "why did that happen?"
"You just started breathing on your own again this morning. You don't have control of all the muscles that help with breathing yet, you'll get better as you recover more. 2 days ago they were talking about giving you a trach, you're doing very well." Carina told her
"Really?" Maya said
"Si, so you could be awake while you needed the vent but I asked them to give you a few more days and you started breathing in your own"
"Glad I don't have a tube in my neck, pooping through my stomach is bad enough but at least I can keep that covered"
"I know, I knew you would hate it, even just a scar, that's why I told them to wait"

No one said anything for a minute then Maya spoke again
"Can I see it?" She asked, even quieter than her voice had been
"See what Bambina" Carina asked
"Everything. The halo, the ostomy, I want to see what I look like"
Carina sighed, she'd known Maya would ask but had been hoping it would take longer than this.
"Ok, I'll take pictures and show you. But you need to remember your surgeries were just a few days ago, everything will look better when it heals" Carina said
"I know, I just need to see" she said
"I know, I will show you"
"Do you want me to leave for this?" Andy asked
"It's fine, you live with us, you'll see everything eventually" Maya said

Carina took a picture of Maya's whole body, then one of just her head so she could see the halo better. Then she pulled down the blanket and carefully lifted up the gown to take a picture of her stomach
"Maya, this doesn't look good, I think you're having some kind of reaction or maybe an infection, your skin's all red. I think I should page dr Grey." Carina said
"Ok, but I still want to see"
"As long as you let me show you another picture when it looks better"
"Ok"

Carina pages dr Grey then takes a picture, before covering her with the blanket again, not bothering to pull the gown down since dr Grey will need to look, and starts showing Maya the pictures.
"That's bigger than I was picturing" Maya says when she see the picture of the halo. "So its screwed into my head?"
"Yes, the bolts go into your skull so its holding your head really well. But it will come out when you don't need traction anymore, unless Amelia decides you need a halo brace but that would also be temporary. Once it comes out you'll just have some little scars but your hair will mostly cover them, even the ones in the front will probably blend in with your hair starting"
"Ok"

Carina shows her the next picture, the one of her abdomen.
"That looks so bad, and it looks like it should be painful. It's so weird that I can't feel it"
"Right now I'm glad you can't feel it because it would hurt" Carina told her, then dr Grey walked in

"Hello Maya, Carina, Andy"
"Hi" Maya said
"Hey dr Grey" Andy said
"Hi Meredith" Carina said
"What's going on?" Dr Grey asked
"I was taking pictures for Maya to see and I noticed the skin around her ostomy is red and inflamed. I know its new but I just wanted you to check it, especially with her spinal injuries..." Carina said
"I'm glad you paged me, I'd much rather check a bunch of times when nothings wrong than have something be wrong and not get it checked, and your right, with spinal cord injuries its more important to get things checked out when something doesn't look right"
"Why?" Maya asked
"Just because you're not going to feel pain if something's wrong, which is usually the first indicator to get something checked. Now, I'm going to take a look" dr Grey explained while getting some gloves and putting them on. She pulled the blanket down to look at Maya's abdomen, pushing on it a bit around the stoma. Then she peeled back a bit of the tape before pulling the gown back down and the blanket up and taking off her gloves.

"It's not infected, I think you're just having a reaction to the adhesive on the ostomy bag. I'll ask a wocn to come see you, a nurse that specializes in stomas and some other things. They'll know more about what different products are available. They'll be very helpful, that will be who will train Carina and eventually you on all your stoma care and who you can ask any questions about the ostomy. So it is someone you'll see long term but if you don't like the person who comes today you can switch. Don't worry about being difficult, find someone you like" dr Grey tells them
"Ok" Maya says, then there's a knock on the door
"Sounds like you have another visitor, I'll make sure someone comes to see you soon"
"Thanks" Maya said, then she looked at Carina. "Is my stomach covered?"
"Yes" Carina told her
"And my legs?"
"Yes, you've got a blanket on. Your arms aren't covered but you look fine" Carina told her
"Ok... Thanks, I'm just nervous, its the fire chief. And she's new, I've never even met her"
"I know, and you're allowed to ask as many questions as you want, its your body"
"I love you, you can let her in now"
"Andy can open the door, I'm staying right here" Carina told her, putting her hand on Maya's head again to comfort her.

The chief came in and Maya told her everything that happened on the call. It took her a long time because she had to take some breaks to just breathe and Carina had to suction her a few more times as she talked but eventually she'd said everything. Andy added what Beckett had said about resources while they were trying to get Maya out. The chief said that there'd be an investigation and that she'd call if she needed anymore information then left.

A while after that Andy left to because she had some stuff to do before being on shift the next day, including removing her divorce papers from the freezer which Maya and Carina both encouraged because they'd been sitting there for too long.