Fill My Heart With Your Love

Chapter 14

A week has passed, Three weeks to go. I have been thinking about the way of telling Emma it. I have to tell her soon. I can't keep it from her, not again. Maybe I'll just put in a poem and give it to her. I think that is the easiest way of telling her. I could still do it today. It's 2pm and she will not be home until 4. I grab my notebook and start writing having to start over quite a few times. Until I wrote it out perfectly.

I am not a boy nor a girl

I am something In between

I feel like a boy one day

Like a girl the other

Sometimes neither

It's a life filled with dysphoria

It's very tiring

Physical end emotionall

I fold the paper two times and put it on her dresser. Now I just wait for her to get home and read it. I lay there for the first 30 minutes checking the time every 2 minutes. I don't wanna wait any longer so I grab the paper go downstairs and put on my shoes. Intell her parents goodbye and start walkingntonthe school. She has a small break in half an hour so I'll be right on time. I get to the school 2 minutes early and text her to come to the bench behind the sportsfield. Once the bell rings notn2 minutes pass before she reaches me. "What are you doing here?" She asks me. I just give her the paper and tell her to read it. She reads every word carefully and takes her time. That is one of the many things I like about her.

I don't think she fully gets what I mean but still I see a supportive smile forming on her face. When she's done reading, she hugs me tight and tells me: "I don't fully get it , but I support you." I let out a little laugh and hug her tighter. I really don't deserve her. She's always so sweet and supportive of me. "I should probably go before they see me." I tell her pulling out of the hug. She gives me a smile and walks to her next class. I sit there for a little longer and then stand up and walk back.

She came home early and wanted me to explain to her what the note actually meant. So I told her everything I read and explain how I feel when I feel dysphoric. I probably told her everything I knew myself. She hugged me and told me she supported me over and over again. I put my finger to her mouth shutting her up. When I realise what I'm doing I put my finger down and start blushing from embarrassment. When I look up she's blushing too. Oh god what did I do.