Dandelions | Yuki Ishikawa

Scared

Yuki's POV...

Scared. That was the first thing I felt when Mio told me that we're expecting. Confused. How? She was on the pill and I've seen her take it everyday when we're together, but like condoms, they're not 100% effective. What are the chances that we're part of that certain percentage where it doesn't work?

I honestly did not know what to say. I was surprised. I wasn't expecting the news. I just... What about volleyball? Her career? We're not even married yet. We don't even have a wedding date. How far along is she? Is it even mines? Of course, it is... what am I saying...

So many things and questions going through my head that I didn't acknowledge her feelings. She must be terrified after finding out, not knowing how I would react. I didn't know how or what to feel about it. Am I going to be a good father? I need time to process this... news...

The second time we had a conversation about it, she dropped another new...

TWINS

I just.. I just got around to finally accepting that we're having a baby and now she's telling me that they're twins... It's just news after news and not having enough time to fully take all of it in. She sent me a picture of the sonogram and there it was... two blobs... She likes to call them little peanuts. She said she was 9 weeks pregnant. I did the calculation in my head and figured that we conceived them sometime during the AVC more or less... We got into an argument after I accidentally said that they're mines... Of  course they are, I was so... needy during that time and basically had her almost every night and I know for a fact that she didn't cheat on me.

We screamed at each other and I didn't even realize that I was stressing her out until mama took the phone from her and lectured me.

"Yuki! I did not raise you treat someone like that" she hissed, "How are you to yell at someone who's pregnant with your children?! She's already stressed enough as it is and here you are yelling at her! Why don't you put yourself in her shoes and see how hard it is for her to be handling this alone without you here"

"I... I don't know what's gotten into me. I'm just stressing out over this and.. I don't know.." I excused... lame excuse. Me, stressed out? I can only imagine how Mio's feeling...

"Get your head out of the gutter and think about what you just did. Grow up. Yuki. You're going to be a father soon and Mio and the twins deserves more than what you're showing right now" She hung up on me. Mama has never been that angry at any of us.

Mio didn't deserve to be yelled at like that. I was out of line... how will I make it up to her? Fuck. I messaged Lee-san to get some advice on.. uhmm.. fatherhood since he recently just had a baby. He said he was available for to talk, so I called him.

"Ishikawa-san" he greeted on the phone.

"Lee-san, how are you?"

We talked for a bit, catching up before asking him what's it like being a father.

"Congratulations on the baby," I started, "how is it being a father and all?"

"It's... difficult, but my wife has been amazing, I don't know how she does it after carrying him for 9 months. That itself was another hurdle" he said.

He explained how his wife was so amazing at taking care of him and his son even after giving birth. How she's never out of energy and will always make sure that both of them are fine. He told me that men can never compare to what women can do especially when it comes to their children.

"Did it affect your.. uhmm... volleyball?" I asked.

"It was difficult to manage at first, scheduling and all, making sure that I'm spending enough time with the family, but it's doable if you put enough effort. Why are you so curious?"