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Guilty?
What's that even mean?

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Author's Pov

Jungkook is still there, standing in the middle of the corridor while his mind is filled with beautiful memories of him and Jimin.

He hates it.

He hates the fact he begins to regret engaging with Aíden deep inside. He doesn't want to hurt the male and a part of that; Aíden's parents believe him so much to take care of their son and he doesn't want to betray them.

Though Jimin left him a while ago, Jungkook still couldn't let go of the male from his mind. It's like he was running in a black circle... His legs keep working and running but at last; he still ended up in the black circle, unable to find his light to get out of lucifer's curse. He should have known that Jimin is Aíden's so-called best friend... He should have asked the male a long time ago.

A pang of pain hit Jungkook at his chest when he recalled the moment Jimin left their college and moved out to Spain to further study there. He knows he shouldn't feel like Jimin abandon him since they already broke up permanently that time but he couldn't help but feel like that.

"Remember what he did to you, Jungkook... He doesn't love you... He just plays with your feelings." Jungkook mumbled out loud to himself, hoping this will make him stop thinking about Jimin and keep his guard strong so that he won't fall for the male again. But will it work? Of course not. It never fell again... He never moved on from Jimin. The Lucifer he claimed to be the person he hates the most; still laid to rest deep inside his heart.

Like a beautiful butterfly playing with an intense flame; Jungkook was so captivated despite the fact he knows it's a dangerous game that could burn his wings and leave him lame. There was no love in their relationship but Jungkook was blinded with the extreme tenderness the older treated him, drowning him in the depth of inexplicable sweetness not knowing his heart held hostage by the fatal blade of his weakness–


Which he called love...

Unconsciously, a beautiful set of crystal tears rolled from his eyes, wetting his cheeks. Call him weak, call him pathetic for crying over something small, call him pussy or anything else– he couldn't care less. He knows that he might be judged for being weak despite the dominant label he got in their relationship but he didn't care. He knows what he feels and right now is nothing other than anguish...

"What am I now?" Jungkook asked himself, finding his inside falling slowly. Yes, for some people this might be a small problem but for Jungkook; it was a very big situation. You didn't know how is the feeling of engaged to the person you don't love in the hope you will move on later and learn, how to love your partner only to find the one you bitterly try to forget; standing right in front of you.

Worst... They even kiss you despite knowing you are engaged to someone.

Oh, the feelings are much more than worst could explain. The words guilty pleasure what suit in Jungkook's feelings that time. He feels guilty for kissing Jimin because that considers cheating already, but nevertheless, at the same time– he feels somewhat of enjoyment inside his stomach. It's like the last pieces puzzle he's been searching for these past few years finally found and complete his puzzle which is his life.

Jungkook gasped when he feel someone's hands wrapped around his waist from behind. "What are you doing here? Is Jimin already left?" The familiar soft voice of his fiancee greeted him as he land his chin on top of Jungkook's right shoulder; failing to notice those tears stain around Jungkook's doe eyes.

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