Keep Running

Chapter 13 - Dano

"It's kale, what do you have against kale?"
"At the moment? You eating it."
"It's good for you."
"Why would you put it with milk?"
"Ewww, this has milk in it? I don't consume animal products eww— oh no it says vegan on it— don't do that to me!!"
"Vegetables should not be with—" he's trying to figure out if it's almond milk.
"Nut juice?"
"Never ever call almond milk that again in my presence."
"Wait I think I'm getting something—" I say, massaging my temples. We are sitting in an empty parking lot while I drink my breakfast and am productive. He's eating his breakfast, which is the flesh of innocent animals.
"What, your mind works like an old radio sometimes it tunes into things?" Eric asks.
"Actually yes---oh I feel like seaweed now do you think that the 7-eleven sells seaweed? " I ask.
"What were you getting and no I am not feeding you seaweed; that's disgusting," he says.
"I like it; it tastes like fish feces—,"
"Do you---say these things just to repulse me," he is gaging.
"Actually yes—,"
"You asshole—,"
" 'is just an asshole' is written in my file multiple places---shh I'm getting something else."
"Why do you shush me when you're talking?"
"Because I want you to think quieter and not talk shhhhh—"
He groans and does not think quieter.
"Got it. Some hillbillies called in their car and child were stolen by a hitchhiker that they picked up, time to go," I say, crawling into the driver's seat while he's in it.
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??'
"I know where it is; it's easier to drive," I have no idea where I'm going but his driving is making me car sick.
"YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN OUT THE DOOR."
"This was easier," basically sitting on his legs as he tries to vacate the seat, "How fast does this baby go?"
"The posted speed limit; it goes the posted speed limit."
"Excellent, I've got the address; put it into your phone," I say, handing him his phone back.
"I thought you knew where we're going????"
"I do. Or I will once you map it."
"I hate you," he says, with as much hate as he can for how adorable I look drinking a horrendous smoothie out of a pink straw while flicking and adjusting every single dial on the car just because I can.
"Thanks, here, hold my smoothie, driver picks the music."
"You have picked the music this entire trip!"
"That's because your pick is no music and that is clearly the wrong pick."
"Will you just go!"
"I don't know where I'm going."
"You're impossible! This is why no one likes you!" he's ready to cry.
"No one likes me to begin with. Being an irritant is just a bonus if everyone's going to think I'm a monster anyway," I tell him, programming the address in myself.
"Maybe people wouldn't think you were a monster if you didn't----randomly attack people and---take their phones and----the attacking people and killing them is honestly a big one."
"Yeah. It is. Isn't it," I say, turning up the music, "Oh well."