𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐒𝐢𝐧; 𝐑𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐧

•24•

Bianca Jade

"What are you doing back here?" Rose asked as we hopped out of the truck. I slammed the door behind myself and stormed inside, not looking back—fearing that if I did, I would cave, his eyes would break me and I wouldn't ever look away again.

"Ward said I could" Rafe grunted, following me inside. I could hear his hurried steps behind me.

"Well he didn't tell me" Rose protested but Rafe ignored her and closed the door behind himself.

I didn't look back at him and rushed straight up stairs, having the intention to lock myself in Sarah's room. I couldn't see any one right now. Not Rafe, not Ward, not Rose, Wheezie— not anyone.

I needed to calm myself and process everything I had just seen. I didn't know how to feel, a part of me wanted to hate Rafe, to think he was a horrible person for what he had done but a part of me still loved him and hoped it could conjure an excuse for his actions and I wasn't sure which one to listen to.

"Bianca—would you slow down, please" Rafe pleaded as he followed close behind me. I ignored him, walking into Sarah's room and shutting the door behind myself. I clicked the lock and sat down on Sarah's bed, my head in my hands as I listen to Rafe knock and ask for me to let him in.

"Go away, Rafe" I shouted, throwing myself into the comforters. It was too soon to see him, I didn't want to make a decision out of impulse and then regret it later. I needed time to think and he needed to understand that.

Never in all my years knowing Rafe, would I of thought that he would do such a thing. He did it without mercy, like no words could stop him, like what he did was right. The look in his eyes after he had pulled the trigger, it was at that moment that I knew I lost him.

I lost the Rafe I loved.

The one standing outside the door, begging for me to listen to him, that wasn't Rafe. That wasn't the child like insensitive, funny, smart, teasing, gorgeous boy that'd I have grown up with. That person was cold, dangerous, not a shred of humanity left in him.

I knew he was gone. Deep in my mind, I knew that there was no going back for Rafe, he hd drifted far beyond my reach and I didn't know how to feel.

I still loved him, with all my heart and I would do anything to go back and erase what had happened but it was impossible and I didn't know what to do.

"Bianca, baby. Please, let me in" his voice was like velvet, the words fell from his tongue so effortlessly, so broken and tired. It made my body shiver, he was tearing me in two from the inside out.

My lower lip trembled as I sat on the edge of the window, still hearing Rafe bang on the door, his voice wavering and begging for me to hear him out but I couldn't, not right now.

I jumped, my feet hitting the ground with a rough thud. I looked back at the window I had jumped from, it wasn't a far drop and I couldn't help the regrettable thoughts flush through my head. I should go back, I need him, he needs me.

"No" I shook my head, Turing away from the house.

I started to run, run as fast as I could away from the house, away from memories, away from his love, away from his annoying laugh, away from his infectious smile, away from the way he made me feel, away from him.

Because he wasn't the same anymore.

I shook the tear that fell from my cheek as I ran, the wind flowing through my hair, my dirty clothes cling to my body in a harsh sweat under the hot summer sun.

I jumped over the yards fence, looking back one more time at the Cameron's estate—knowing that this was most likely the last time I would see it's walls.

I turned around and started to run again, watching the sun fall beyond the sea line in the distance. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't know where else to go but straight, follow the way of the wind, the great smell of sea water, the chime of seagulls—it would be my new peace.

Since the one I had is long gone.

And before I could even stop myself, I felt my feet carry me to his house. The beat down structure on the corner of the cut—it was quiet, dark, the grass long. I knew he wasn't going to be home, why would he be?

I breathed out and stepped up to his door. There wasn't anyones company that I needed right now more then his. He was the only one who understood how I truly felt, the hurt that I was experiencing—I knew he was all too familiar with and I was hoping he could cure it or even relieve it for a short time.

The feeling of watching someone leave without leaving was something that was unbearable. Watching the colour of their eyes drain and the colour of their skin change. Their personality toss itself down the drain until there was nothing left but a stranger.

He had seen it first hand, Been through the worst of it—worse then myself but he still managed to smile every single day, to make my day lighter. He was so good at masking the pain behind the beautiful blue of his eyes, the secrets of his home life in the sandy blonde of his hair, his scars behind the sun kissed burn on his skin.

How?

I didn't know.

But he did. I knew it was possible that I would never get over Rafe, I knew deep down that in the end—he had me wrapped around his ringed pinky but I wanted to forget, even if it was just a night. I needed someone to talk too shout feeling like I was a burden on their half.

Don't get me wrong, I loved my friends. They all treated me as though I was family but he was different. Might not show it in the light but he was the one I befriended the most, the one I could actually talk to, who I could trust to keep me safe.

I knocked on his door, patter of his fly screen against the flaked paint on the wall sung through the house. There was no answer, I knew there wouldn't be but I knocked again.

"Please" I said aloud, knowing no one would hear me "I really need to talk to you right now, Just you—not Kie, not Pope, not John B, not Sarah—you" I placed my forehead on the old wood of the door, the splinters digging into my skin.

"Bianca?" I spun around at the sound of his voice. I furrowed my eye brows, he shouldn't be here, he should be anywhere but here.

"You can't be here right now" I shook my head.

"And you can be?" He rose an eye brow, the small smile on his face.

"I wasn't expecting you to be here" I shrugged "You should be helping John B"

"Kiara thought it was best if we just lay low for a night. The police are after John B, they think he shot sheriff Peterkin and it won't help if we're all arrested" his heavy boots stepped up to the porch, approaching me slowly.

"That's smart" I nodded and wiped the stray tear that fell down my cheek.

"What happened?" He asked.

"Rafe—" I ducked in a breath " He— he shot Peterkin and I don't know what to do"

"Come inside. No use talking out here when it starts to get cold" he smiled, the dimples on his cheeks piercing his skin.

"Thank you, JJ"

Been a few, I'm still working on the JJ fanfic so hopefully I can get it out for y'all soon xx

Word count 1372.