Chapter 6 - Despondency

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Time of death, 1:03 AM.

I can't move. Which will happen first, I throw up or spontaneously combust? Or both?

"Hey," came a quiet voice.

Nat crouched by my side, arm resting on the back of my chair. She tilts my head up to look her in the eyes. I can barely meet them before my eyes are swimming with tears.

"Let me help you up," Nat whispered. She rises slowly, both hands outstretched for mine. I raise myself from my chair while holding her hands like a child. I follow Nat blindly out of the room, unsure of what in my body compels me to do so.

I hadn't noticed Captain Rogers wasn't in the room with us during our exchange. In exiting the surgical viewing room, we rejoin the Captain in an adjacent hospital space.

I am struck by the sight of Nick's body lying on a gurney. Nat walks up to him, while I hang back by the door, gripping its frame.

I lost my father, and now I've lost Nick. The thought of having to break the news, and subsequently my baby sister's heart, is enough to make me nauseous. I seize a nearby handrail and steady my wavering stature.

"I need to take him," Maria murmured.

Nat and Captain Rogers leave the room. I take whatever energy I can muster to lift my leaning frame off the wall. I pace sluggishly through the hallway outside, trying to get my phone to connect. Shitty hospital service.

I needed to call Matt; he should hear the news from me first. I became distracted when I overheard an exchange between Nat and Captain Rogers.

"Why was Fury in your apartment?"

"I-I don't know."

"You're a terrible liar. Fury was shot in your apartment, and you went in pursuit after the shooter. Ballistics read as Soviet-made. Long hair, mask, metal arm? Thought so. Talk soon."

I didn't have a moment to ponder what she was going on about before Nat approached me.

"Coulson? C'mon, let's go," I hear Nat speak to me, but I'm not sure I fully registered it. I mumble a response, and we both move toward the exit.

I sunk down into the passenger side of her car. She buckles herself in, then turns to me.

"Hey. Something's going on with Rogers, and the lot of this isn't adding up. I'm worried a certain mythical man has emerged, so I am going to investigate—and that means Rogers, Fury's death, S.H.I.E.L.D.—all of it.

As my secondary and this being my mission—albeit unofficial—you can join. Do you want to? Can you do this?" Nat asked.

I lift my head up, and turn to meet Nat's eyes. My thirst for answers and vengeance must be quenched.

"I'm ready."

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