August 24th- Book One in the May 3rd series

Chapter 70-- Gotta Go Fast and Suck My Bagel at 10:51......:((((

"For being bisexual." He responds.

"Oh. That's not your fault, so she shouldn't need to forgive you. You mean accept. You want her to accept you. Unless you're going to..." I stop.

Unless he would be willing to leave me to be with a girl so he can have his mom back. If he acted like he only liked girls.

If I was the mistake here.

"What?! No! That's not what I meant!" He backtracks, "I guess I meant accept."

"Are you sure?" I ask.

As I said, everything he says is stupid.

He doesn't know what he's talking about.

"You backed out of it real quickly. I don't know if that is a cover up or if you meant what you said in the first place." I explain.

He sighs, "Josiah. I love you. And even if I broke up with you, that wouldn't stop me from possibly being with another boy. I just have to hope she accepts it one day. But as for the breaking up..." He takes one of my hands and holds it. "I'd never do that. I can't tell the rhino he's not officiating. He would be devastated."

"Why would he care? He can officiate anywhere for anyone."

"No. He's coming out of retirement for this wedding. Then he's going back. We're very lucky."

"Retirement? How old is he?"

"Four hundred and seven... And a half."

"...What? No! He would be dead; That's too old."

"He's all wise and powerful. He is time itself, this rhino."

"Ah. So, he's a figment of your imagination, then? Because that's highly impossible."

"No. He is all powerful. I pray to him every four hundred and seven and a half minutes."

"Damien. You need to see a psychiatrist." I tell him.

"I was kidding." He says.

"Me, too. Kind of."

Maybe he should go see a psychiatrist. But not because of this.

"Because of other things. Not because of the rhino." I smile.

"Everything is because of the rhino. The rhino is all."

"The rhino is a freak of nature. Four hundred and seven, and a half, you say? Wow."

"Chubby unicorn." Is all he says.

"I'm sorry... What?"

"The rhino. That's why he's all powerful. He's a descendent of a unicorn of course. He's just a chubby armored unicorn."

"Unicorns are horses...? What the hell?"

"I stand by my statement."

"I do not understand your statement even a little. Let's talk about something that makes sense. Go."

"Okay. So. Chocolate chunk cookies..." He starts.

"NO. I'm sick of fucking hearing about those damn cookies, Damien!" I whine.

"Wow. Okay, boomer. You pick something then."

"Let's talk about Taylor Swift!"

"The queen. If she runs in the next presidential election, I'm fudging the votes so she wins and can find a way to become queen."

"She can't run for president."

"Uh, have you seen some of our presidents? I'm pretty sure she fucking can." He laughs.