W.A.R.M.T.H: The Prologue

Fear of Being Seen

Amora

       Raven always needs all of the attention. Not only does she have every other guy drooling over her but now she has to get Ren and AJ too? I mean I don't mind, usually but for some reason, watching AJ look at her like that, grab at her thigh like that. It gets on my nerves. I'm uncomfortable. It's like my brother trying to screw my best friend. I freeze. Brother? Is that what the feeling is? As soon as I saw him this morning I was put at ease. I shouldn't have run away but what am I supposed to say? When AJ leans back into his seat and away from Raven, he places his hand on the small of my back, his touch bringing a slight shock of warmth. He smiles at me

"It's not like you don't know I'm not serious about her." I pull away and look at him

"How could you tell?" I ask him skeptically.

"I could feel it. Surely you're feeling the aftermath of our...encounter last night as well?"

    When the words leave his mouth, I know exactly what he means. And he's right, I can still sense if not feel his emotions and I know they're not mine being as I suddenly felt 100% more attracted to Ren earlier today. As well as a suicidal despair last night. Which I know couldn't be mine. I don't deserve the luxury of self-pity. I simply nod and look away from him.

"Are you okay?" he asks me, concern clouding his gaze. I smile at him politely, "Fine, thanks." And turn my attention back to the teacher. Feeling a warm fuzzy feeling creep into my bones as he shifts closer to me and drags his chair to where we're almost touching. I feel a sudden tension and I look over at Ren, he's staring at me. Like I've stolen AJ from him. Does he even know that's not what AJ and I have? "You should be with him." I nod over to Ren. When AJ follows my gesture, his eyes fill with longing. But he quickly looks away

"I can't."

" Why do you make it so complicated? The way I see it, you like him, he likes you. You've both cared for each other for some time and the only reason you're not together now is fear."

"How do you know that?"

"Know what?"

"That it's fear?"

"AJ..I saw everything." I whisper to him, still feeling the weight of his pain on my own chest.

He grabs my hand, "I'm not afraid."

His gaze on mine is vulnerable and intense. He wants me to believe him so badly, but I can't. Not until he believes himself.

"I'm sorry, I know you're lying."

    He shoots out of his seat "I'm not afraid!" He speaks with his full voice. "Ahem?" the teacher inquires. He looks away from me, his gaze still heated but I can't, can't look at him. His eyes find Ren's and he freezes. He looks around the classroom and he walks out. I stand all the way up and look around Everyone. Is staring at me. Every single pair of eyes on me, everything dead silent. My eyes meet with Ren's. There's no denying the pain in them.. How much damage has AJ done to him with all of the denial? I pull my hood down over my head even more and I walk out of the classroom. I'm so overwhelmed with guilt I don't even know how to cope. Why is he so afraid?