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( CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO: THE ART OF MAKING LOVE ) February, 1993
❝ you give me a feeling that I've never felt before. ❞
◯
Some would say that the commencement of a new year would bring a new light. Somehow, Janet didn't know if that best described the beginning of 1993. It was a rainy night when Janet made her delayed return to New York after months of staying away. Upon her return, she noticed a different aura swimming in the air. The sky was dreary with somber clouds, buckets of rain was wetting the concrete streets and moulding against the brick skyscrapers.
Thunder rattled in the distance, lightning bolds cracking through the grey clouds on occasion, and it further solidified Janet's troubled nature. The singer didn't feel at peace. It was strange, since she thought she would've felt excited as new possibilities began to emerge in her brain. However, after just recording the final tracks for her new album, Janet felt empty. And that emptiness was coming from her soul.
The thing was, she knew why she felt this way—she changed. When Janet Jackson glided back into the city, her long, honeycomb curls and natural brown makeup made her look different. In her defence, she felt different. She wasn't the same woman she was before, she wasn't the girl that felt fearful of her future, that felt indecisive about what she wanted. No, that Janet was long gone. Hence her arrival here in New York.
Janet's quick visit had an underlying purpose, a purpose that involved none other than Devon Emmet. Five months they hadn't seen each other, and after word got out that Devon quickly changed his mind about his move to Paris, Janet intended to talk to him. To her knowledge, he was on tour with Bobby for the past three months.
TJ was kind enough to inform her that Devon returned a few days ago from the tour. However, the male warned her that Devon Emmet wasn't himself these days. He kept the details minimal, and it made Janet's heart leap with worry. Whenever Devon wasn't himself, he'd normally act out impulsively. But what would she know? She hadn't seen the man for months.
She supposed she'd find out soon enough. Devon Emmet and Janet Jackson had been separated a hundred times before, but this felt different. It felt like an enormous elephant was forever standing in between the two of them, never allowing them to truly be close to one another. They both knew what it was, but they never addressed it. Now, after being separated for months, Janet feared that even more space distanced the two.
Nervously, Janet Jackson marched through the halls of Devon's apartment building, raindrops sprinkled in her tawny hair and her heart thrashing through her chest. The sight of these halls made her mind flash with memories, memories that she tucked away in a loving place. And yet, that love didn't keep her calm. She wore a sweater with a long skirt, but her attire barely kept her warm from the damp weather outside. Thankfully, the journey wasn't very long, and her preconceived nerves kept her distracted.
