I Can't Live Without You (WMBW)

Confessions

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."
― Mahatma Gandhi

"To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you."
― C.S. Lewis

"The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward."
― Steve Maraboli

"Any fool knows men and women think differently at times, but the biggest difference is this. Men forget, but never forgive; women forgive, but never forget."
― Robert Jordan

Ahalieia~

"Then what happened?"

"I called him a really bad name then he left." I cried.

"Laya y'all need to really talk. And without all that hoopla and carrying on."

"I can't momma. He hurt me so bad."

"And it won't get any better unless y'all fix it."

"I say we just shoot the bastard." Diamond chimed in coming from the kitchen.

"How about we shoot you. Who in the hell told you to leave without a trace then run off and get married and have a baby?!" Momma yelled.

"That's the past momma. The present is Dallas and the future is his face on a milk carton. We looking toward the future momma."

"Then you go hoe and forget to tell the baby daddy he even had a baby." I mumbled.

"Excuse me?" Diamond urged.

"You heard me."

"Me and my relationships ain't got shit to do with you. You need to be worried about the dude you got four kids with and ain't even married!"

"It got shit to do with me when it comes to my friends. Didn't nobody tell you to fuck Austin a month after you met him! At least my kids know who their dad is!"

"At least I have a dad. Where's yours?"

I felt my blood boil. I wanted to hit her right in her throat.

"Marshay!" Momma scolded.

"You spread ya' legs and get pregnant and the first thing daddy does is get you an apartment, pay your rent, and put you through college. You're a spoiled bitch."

"I took care of my daughter and I'm taking care of her now without any help from my parents."

"Parents! You got a mom and a dad you stole because you couldn't learn to keep your own around."

"Diamond stop." Momma protested.

"No it's fine momma. Come on Dee. Tell me how you really feel. Tell me what you been holding back all these years. You mad cause your dad married a black woman huh? Is that it. Or is it cause you had to live with your mom so I became daddy's little girl. Or is it cause you wanted Dallas all those years before but he came to me first. What is it Dee?"

"Fuck you Laya. You stole Dad from me! You steal everything! You were always the pretty one. The smart one. Got all the straight A's. Made it into a honors college. You did everything to stay ahead of me and it worked. You won!"

"Diamond." Momma called.

She turned around running up the stairs while I got up grabbing my keys.

"Laya baby wait."

"It's fine momma. I'll call you later."

I left and got in my truck driving home. I pulled up and got out in going the house.

"Mommy!" Vickie cried running to me.

I picked her up and kissed her forehead moving her curls.

"What's wrong baby?"

"Daddy whooped me! It hurt."

"Go upstairs and lay down okay. Wipe your face."

She nodded her head as I put her down and ran up stairs. I walked in the kitchen seeing Dallas with his head on the table.

"Why?" I asked.

"She was being a brat and told me in these exact words 'I can do whatever the hell I want. I'm the princess' so I spanked her. Now she hates me. Everyone does."

"Well don't be sad. She needed a spanking. She's spoiled and she gets away with too much."

"Austin laughed so hard he choked then left to the strip club with a video to show the strippers."

I leaned forward grabbing his hand. He looked up at me with red tear stained cheeks.

"I don't hate you Dallas I'm just disappointed and hurt."

"The first time was just a dumb drunken mistake. She just gave me head. Then the second time she seduced me and we had sex. And I take complete responsibility for it all. I shouldn't have tried to hide anything. I should've just been honest."

"Was it something I did? Am I-"

"No Laya! You perfect. In every way. That was the dumbest thing I've ever did. Because I chose a orgasm over happiness and my own kids."

"You made me feel like I wasn't good enough. Like I can't keep a man without him laying down with someone else. I felt like less of a person."

"And that's my fault because I lost a good thing. I let the love of my life slip through my fingers and I could never forgive myself for that. If someone did that to my little girls I'd kill him. I know I would. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry I kissed Jacob."

"You don't have to be sorry. I wasn't even mad at you for it because I deserved it. It just made me mad realizing someone could take you from me."

"I don't wanna be together right now. Not for awhile. Let's just be parents okay and try to earn that trust back."

He nodded his head and got down on his knees. He placed a hand on my stomach laying his head on my lap.

"I'm so sorry you guys. I'm gonna be the best daddy ever. You're never gonna have to worry about anything cause daddy's got you. Plus you've got the best mom anyone could ask for. She's pretty fine too."

I giggled flicking him in the head.

"Just stay in there as long as you can. Daddy doesn't want you to grow up too fast."

"I wish they'd come out. One of them is pressing against my bladder."

He chuckled standing up and grabbed my hand pulling me up with him.

"I'm sorry Laya."

"I forgive you Dallas. But I don't know if I can forget."

He sighed and hugged me kissing my forehead. Then bent down and kissed my stomach. He grabbed his keys and left.

I had a feeling things would be different now. Maybe even better hopefully. Because now the truth was finally out. All of it.

*Laya's Mom*