Silence

{23} Soundless

"I understand this rule and I can follow it. But what will it matter if you don't actually act like family to me?" My words leave a thick silence in the air. I can see what I said struck something in Ambrose and Kohen. Sorin is in deep thought whilst Caspian is being Caspian and jasper has no reaction. 

"Of course we're f*cking family. We are only doing what we know. We're all sh*tty influences and we don't know how to show love for sh*t, but we love you Aspen. We f*cking love you, do you hear me?" Sorin says sternly.

"Really?" I'm surprised by Sorin's words. How could they love me? They barely know me and now they love me? This seems surreal. 

"Really?" Jasper mocks in a high pitched voice. "Of f*cking course Aspen. Why is that so hard to believe?" 

The one time this boy decides to speak and he says the most idiotic words of the day. He basically just said he loves me. This feels crazy, especially since I just slapped him and now he's claiming that he loves me.

"Maybe because all day you have been blaming me for this situation. You have never done anything to prove what Sorin just said. How can you expect me to believe those words so easily, especially from you?" I direct to Jasper.

"F*ck" Jasper mutters while dragging his hand down his face. "I'm sorry Aspen."

I- what?

He's sorry?

HE'S SORRY?

"YOU'RE SORRY?" I blurt out and he turns to me in a slight surprise. 

"Don't make me f*cking repeat myself." He says sternly.

"It's going to take more than a simple 'I'm sorry'. Your words hurt Jasper, more than I'd like to admit. You're supposed to be my big brother and what you said cant be simply forgotten." I reply truthfully. 

"What the f*ck am I supposed to do then?" Jasper asks, getting frustrated. 

"Figure it out." I say and he lets out a frustrated sigh. "You all need to figure it out. In the mean time can you let me out of this car, I need some time to myself." 

Everyone gives me a look and I let out a sigh.

"I'm going to my room, you can have Rhys babysit me if you want just give me some time." 

Everyone starts to exit the car and I trail behind them. Before we reach the front door, everyone stops walking suddenly. I almost bump into Caspian but quickly stop myself before I do. All my brothers turn to look at me and all I can think of at this moment is how the heck did they coordinate that so gracefully. I give Caspian, who is in front of me a questioning look. 

"I understand your frustrations with us, but don't you dare ever run off like that again. I'll be expecting the full story of your endeavors tomorrow morning, and don't dream of leaving any important details out like you did back in the car. Do I make myself clear, Aspen?" Caspian uses what seems to be his most intimidating voice and I find myself almost cowering away from him.  All I can manage to do is squeak a quick 'clear' and Caspian nods his head in satisfaction. 

We all go inside and everyone splits up, Caspian and Ambrose go to the west wing, Sorin goes to the gym, Jasper disappears and I watch Kohen go into the movie room with a bottle of vodka. I make my way upstairs and find Rhys outside my door, just standing there.