Mended Broken Souls (✔️)

Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Venice:

On the way na ako sa inyo, Shia.

I read her message, but didn't reply at it. Sabado ulit ngayon at may meeting daw ulit kaming mga youth doon sa Plaridel Parish. Kasali na ang mga youth sa iba't-ibang churches na part ng Parish. May pag-uusapan daw na mahalaga.

The Christmas was already done yesterday. We were a complete family joining the mass yesterday but it feels like I was a lost soul who's just forcing myself to be part of them.

I have a complete family yet it feels like I'm still puzzled.

Mayroon ding noche buena pero hindi talaga ako nag-enjoy, honestly, the same feeling for the past Christmas with them. Pero kahit papaano ay hindi naman ganoon kabigat sa pakiramdam dahil pilit na ni-la-lighten up ni papa ang mood ko.

I was still happy because Mama greeted me a 'Merry Christmas' even if I could see that it was a force great for her.

Hindi ako masiyadong nagsasalita sa mesa kagabi dahil alam ma alam ko nang iiiba ni mama ang topic 'pag ako na ang nagsalita. I've learned already so for me, it is better to be silent than to talk and still be interrupted intentionally.

Akisha, on the other hand, still annoys me to the core. Kahit na maganda man ang pinapakita niya, I'm still thinking that it is her way to make me feel envious more towards her. Pakiramdam ko, nang-iinggit lang siya sa atensiyong nakukuha niya kay mama kaya hindi ko siya tinuturing na kapatid dahil turing ko sa kaniya'y ka-kompetensiya.

I am a sinner for feeling one of the deadly sins, envy, but this is the truth of me. I am a sinner for this deadly sin because of the constant struggle that life has given me since I was born.

I'm still not prepared for the 9 AM meeting in the Plaridel church because I was still lying on my bed despite of the fact that it was 8:30 AM already. My body just doesn't have the motivation to move today because negative thoughts have entered my mind again. My emotional problem influenced my physical body and I can say that it was so hard.

"Hoy, Señorita Ashia, nandito na si Venice! Bakit hindi ka pa bumabangon d'yan? Ano gusto mo? Paliguan at bihisan kita riyan sa kama?" Narinig kong pagbubungaga ni mama nang bigla siyang pumasok sa kwarto ko, nanlalaki pa ang mga mata sa inis.

Right, she's not at school today because today's the start of weekend.

I lazily stood up from my bed and I didn't give her a stare because I might give her a glare. Dapat ko lang talagang kontrolin ang sarili ko dahil ina ko pa rin siya.

"Bumangon na ho," walang emosyon kong saad at naglakad na patungong banyo dahil ayaw ko nang marinig pa ang susunod niyang mga sermon.

Pagod na ako sa araw-araw na sermon niya. Sermong hindi katulad ng sermon ng ibang ina na tunog naiinis man, halata pa rin ang pagpapapahalaga, kundi isang sermong parang kinuha sa galit ng kaibuturan ng puso niya na hindi ko alam kung saan nagmula.

"Tara na," aya ko kay Venice nang matapos akong maghanda, 8:50 AM na.

She was in the sala and I saw her and my mother earlier talking to each other pero ngayo'y nasa kwarto na si mama kaya mabuti na lang at hindi ko maririnig ang pagkukumpara niya na naman sa 'kin kay Venice.

Agad isinukbit ni Venice ang kaniyang braso sa aking braso. Usually, I removed her arm from my arm but today, I have no strength to do it. I am just tired in everything that even during I was eating earlier, hindi na sana ako tutuloy sa pagkain dahil walang gana pero naisip ko ang mga taong walang kinakain ngayon at gutom na gutom.