Come Back With Me

He Dreams of Her

"There's been no signs of her in Germany," Howard informs them sadly.

It's only been a couple days but they are all hoping for some kind of lead. As much as they would all love to leave that second to go track her down, they can't. They have three infants that they have to think of.

Bucky is beginning to panic. He hasn't slept a moment since he found out she was gone. He knows Steve probably hasn't either. They both knew hydra all too well and they know that if they don't find her soon, they don't know what will be left of her to find.

Bucky begins to pace in frustration.

"Maybe I was wrong, things are still fuzzy with dates and places," Bucky says.

"You're reasoning makes sense, Barnes," Peggy says.

"Then where is she!" He yells.

Bucky can feel a panic attack coming on. He's had a couple of them since she got taken and each one is horrible. None of his panic attacks are ever pleasant but he never realized how much worse they are when she's not there to help him through it.

Steve can see him struggling so he walks over to him and places a comforting hand on his shoulder and grabs his forearm in case he starts collapsing.

"We will find her, Bucky. We have to," he says.

Then all of a sudden, it's Bucky who has to hold Steve up. He grips his chest and falls to his knees.

Steve gives out a terrifying scream and Bucky instantly knows that something terrible is happening.

"What's happening?" Peggy yells.

She runs over to support her husband.

Bucky has completely let go of Steve and is shaking his head in denial. He begins walking backwards until his back hits the wall but he can't look away from his best friend sobbing on the floor.

"No," he says.

Peggy looks up at Bucky because clear he knows what's happening to her husband.

"What is going on, Barnes?" She asks.

"Ellie is dead," Bucky says flatly.

Howard and Peggy's head snap up to stare at Bucky.

"What?" They say simultaneously.

Bucky has been around Steve long enough to know that he isn't screaming in physical pain. This is emotional pain. This is the kind of pain that tears you from the insides and leaves you broken. This pain is the pain of losing a twin.

Steve feels like he's dying. He's only felt this feeling two times before, in 1931 after the incident and in 2011 when Lizzie died. This is the feeling of his twin's heart stopping.

He can vaguely feel Peggy trying to reach him but he's too wrapped up in his grief.

He just curls up on the floor and holds his head in his hands.

They just got her back, how can she be gone again?

"We messed up," Steve says.

"What? What do you mean?" Peggy asks.

Steve finally looks up and meets Bucky's eyes.

"We messed up the timeline," Steve says through sobs.

They are both 100% responsible for Lizzie's early demise. If they never came back, she wouldn't be dead at 32 years old. She would have died an old woman who lived a full life.

"It wasn't your fault," Peggy says.

Peggy was the only person in this room who was completely innocent of her death. It was Steve and Bucky's fault that they were selfish enough to go back and interfere in their lives. It was also Howard's fault because he talked Lizzie into helping with the serum despite knowing how dangerous it could be.