Remorse- Yaman realises all his sins.

Chapter 22

"You are the answer to every prayer I've offered. You are a song, a dream, a whisper, and I don't know how I could have lived without you for as long as I have."
― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

Seher looked at Yaman with infinite love and yearning and was pondering on where to start narrating her life story from.

Finally, she took a long breath and smiling at him, decided to begin with the best part of her life- her childhood and that beautiful age of innocence, which had shaped her and made her the woman she was today.

Once Seher started speaking, she didn't even realise that gradually she was opening up her heart to Yaman and blossoming under his attention, like a rosebud opening up in the first season of spring.

She began,"Well, I was always a quiet and shy child and looked upto Kevser Abla for everything. She was my hero! Being the youngest in the family,I was loved and immensely pampered by everyone, including my extended family. We were a very close knit and happy family, supporting each other and being each other's backbone in times of need."

"Whenever we went out to meet people, I would hide behind my sister, as I was a shy and diffident child and preferred either quietly reading a book or playing with my selected group of friends only." She then reminisced and smiling fondly, continued," Do you know the nursery rhyme 'Mary and the little lamb'? I followed Abla like the little lamb in that poem; following her wherever she went, hiding behind her."

"I was also fond of singing. Abla would teach me classical singing whenever we both had time. Abla was not only my elder sister but she had the place of a mother too, in my life! She tried her best to ensure that I never felt the emptiness created by the absence of our mother."

She continued," As a kid and even as a teenager, I was a complete tomboy and was never interested in anything to do with make up or dressing up. In fact, in my teenage years, I was in self denial for a long time that...". Suddenly Seher realised what she was about to say and she abruptly stopped mid sentence. She was mortified !!

Yaman looked at her and gently prodded, "Evet? You were in self denial for a long time that...???"

Seher could not look into his eyes and looking down at the sand beneath her feet, she absently started making circles in them with her fingers and finally said,"I denied for a long time t-t-that I was turning into a woman. When changes started occuring in my body, my abla was the one who guided me about, well...about everything. She never, even for a minute, let me feel that we didn't have a mother to guide us. Abla was my rock and my anchor in life, Always."

Yaman smiled at her affectionately and said, "Well, I would have loved to meet that tomboyish Seher. She must have been adorable." Then looking her up and down, he said seductively, " Though you don't look like a tomboy to me now, from any angle. I can see a beautiful and graceful woman who makes her husband go weak in the knees, everytime she is near him."

Seher didn't know how to respond. She was really bad at taking compliments.

She looked away and nervously continued, "As a student, I was diligent and hardworking. I was always interested in social sciences and my favourite subjects were english literature, history and geography. I also loved creating things with my hands, be it food, pottery or knitting. It gave me immense peace and satisfaction. I loved gardening too at one point. Baba taught me about different types of seeds, vegetables and flowers as we grew them in our small kitchen garden."

Suddenly, he could see a softness in her eyes as she continued,"Abla and I were also big pets lovers and we had many cats and an adorable dog at our place. The dog's name was Talu and he was so cute and lovable. As kids, in jest we would call Talu brother of Kevser and Seher. He was our lifeline and sunshine in life.I remember we cried for months after he passed away. It was like losing a family member. "