Don't Give Up On Me

Chapter 18

Saturday, 7:27pm

Derek walked hand in hand next to Meredith as she was wheeled to surgery. "So your just excising some metastatic, right? Nothing else?" He asked.

"Yes, Derek. It should be a fairly simple procedure." Dr Swender replied. "And what if there's too many to get them all?" He asked.

"Then we'll get as much as we can and close her up. This is to help slow down the progression of the cancer." Swender replied. "I'll...be fine." Meredith croaked from her bed.

The pre-op drugs they gave her made her sleepy. And not to mention the fact that she felt like crap. "I know you will. I'm just making sure." Derek replied, squeezing her hand.

"All right. Ready for this Grey?" Bailey asked as she approached them. "Yeah Doctor B. Try not to butcher me." Meredith answered with a sleepy grin.

"No promised." Bailey joked back. "All right." Swender chuckled. "This is where you stop, Derek." She said, turning serious.

"Can't I just go in until she's under?" Derek begged. "I'm sorry Derek, but family members aren't allowed in the OR. You know that." Dr Swender replied sympathetically.

Derek sighed and looked down at Meredith. "I love you so much. I'll see you when you wake up." He whispered, kissing her softly.

"If...if I die, make sure Bailey gets that scarf. And.." she trailed off to cough. "And you can move on. Marry another woman-"

"Meredith Grey, enough. You are not going to die. I'll see you Once your out of surgery. I love you, okay?" Derek cut in. "I love you too." She replied.

Derek watched as the love of his life was rolled away into the OR.

"Are you ready for this Grey? You know how it works." Bailey asked as Meredith was transferred to the OR table. "I'm ready. Just....if I....make sure Derek is okay." Meredith whispered.

"I will, Meredith. We'll see you when you wake up." Bailey said softly. She began hyperventilating, finally processing that she was about to undergo a long, difficult surgery.

"Shh, you're alright." Bailey comforted gently. It was no use as Meredith's breathing became further rapid and uneven. The anesthesiologist looked up, concerned.

"She's getting hypoxic." He warned.

"Oh screw it." Bailey muttered, putting down her instruments and walking around the operating table. She held Meredith's head between her hands, tracing soothing circles into the mesh of the scrub cap.

"Deep, slow breathes. In, out. Good, I've got you." Bailey spoke softly, and Meredith was able to calm down.

"You're gonna have to re-scrub." Meredith giggled, noticing her mentor had broken the sterile field to comfort her.

"Worth it." Bailey responded, smiling under her mask as she turned and went back to the scrub room.

—-

A surgical tech pushed anesthetic through the IV. Meredith outstretched her arm as Bailey returned from the scrub room. They entwined hands as Meredith's eyes fluttered shut.

"Scalpel." Bailey's strong voice demanded authority, but internally her confidence has begun to waver. She was about to slice open her favorite intern. Surgery was harsh, violent, completely opposite of the love her maternal instinct longed to demonstrate.

"I've got you, Grey." Bailey whispered before starting the procedure.

Several minutes later, Doctor Swinder quickly scrubbed
in, and entered the operating room.