A Secret Between Us.

12.Newspaper.

I kept staring at her, trying to figure out what she was looking at, and not being able to turn around, I asked, "What is it?"
But the voice that answered that question wasn't hers.

"You guys suck!" shouted Luca, who had obviously accompanied his mother, both worried about what had happened, but who had warned them?
I jumped up even if my head was still spinning, too much: "wait, Luca, wait!" I tried to stop him with the words because I would never have been able to run after him in that state, but there was nothing to do, so I moved my gaze to Livia who seemed shocked, I sighed loudly closing my eyes for a few moments, I heard a loud scream and saw immediately after the two women grabbing each other by the hair "don't you suck? Huh??" Livia wasn't herself, but Julianne was already feeling tremendous guilt and in that case she just wanted to take all the blows, not even reacting to one of the many insults Livia yelled at her until I stepped in, splitting them up.
All the things that she had just said, she who was still my wife and who was carrying someone else's child, made such an anger grow in me, a desire to throw out all the thoughts that I had kept to myself until now and this time I decided to follow my instinct, my desire to free myself: "She? She should be disgusted? You!" I pointed my finger at her while my voice got bigger and bigger "YOU! You have a child in there...you have...you have a child, who is not mine!" I quickly approached her, we were face to face "how do you feel? Huh?" "..mum? Is it..is it true?" whispered Luca, demoralized by everything he was learning in those few minutes, Livia stared at me with a nasty look and moving her mouth, without letting out a line of voice not to be heard, she told me "I'm going to kill you" then she turned towards Luca and started to stutter nonsense sentences.
I could see Luca backing away, my heart was breaking as I sensed my world collapsing with such rapidity.

"Luca..Luca!" as I shouted my son's name I found myself in the room alone, completely alone, Julianne had run away just as my family was doing at that moment.
The loneliness I felt in those moments made me feel even more the weight of the embarrassing situation I was in, I thought about everything, the sorrow was eating me alive.

As soon as I was released, I left the hospital and went straight to my favourite pub, once I was seated I saw a newspaper on my right on one of the many stools near the - I looked at it in passing at first, but I was struck by the headline on the front page, so I decided to grab it and bring it to me, at first I would never have thought I could read those things, but then I connected the reason why Livia was in hospital that morning....

By now it was public knowledge after the article written by a journalist from The Sun, the words that were used were the same: "Oscar winner rushed to hospital, it was a fight according to one of the crew members, was the director not satisfied with his work?"

I closed my eyes and swallowed as I thought about everything that might come out from that moment on.

There was someone who knew exactly what was going on inside that room that damn day.

My head was spinning, spinning hard, it was a vortex of negativity, of sorrows, I was hitting rock bottom, or at least I was very close to it.

From that moment on, I did nothing but put my sorrows behind me, how? I locked myself up in the new house that Luke found for me, the only person who had stayed by my side and who was trying in any way he could to keep me away from the possible trouble I would get into because of the questionable amount of alcohol I was consuming every day.

And yes, of course alcohol was the magic helper that made my evenings much lighter, between the sofa and the bathroom.

But this vicious circle was interrupted when one of those evenings Liv knocked on my door, desperate.

"Please open up!" She was shouting from outside, I wasn't in the best condition to receive Liv inside my house, but more importantly how did she find out the address if I hadn't heard from her mother?

I let her in, I was dizzy from the alcohol, but I could still follow the speech she had started as soon as she stepped inside the flat: "He's doing this because of you!!! You are our problem! Do you understand that? Why did you ruin everything? Why is he running away from me, saying he doesn't believe in love and me? What should I do? He ran away from home, did you know that?"

I leaned my hand against the corridor wall and shook my head slightly: "What?"

"Yes! I thought he was here, but no...he's after you...have you forgotten you have a family?"

At that very moment I realised how much time I had wasted by lying on the floor of that still white and empty house as I had been feeling lately.

"Ok..ok I'll get my keys and we'll go look for him, do you have any idea where he might be?"

Liv shook her head, "no.."
I turned around and grabbed the keys: "try to think about it...come on..." I tried to get the answer out of her mouth, I knew well that she was the only one who could imagine where Luca was.

"Maybe..maybe I know".

As soon as I heard that sentence, I grabbed the girl and we rushed together to the car, in which she drove me to the "secret" spot and a beach in Brighton.

After parking, I followed Liv who slowly led the way to a small lighthouse.

As soon as she saw Luca she completely detached herself from the world around her and started to run towards him who was waiting for her with open arms, that embrace, that hold, even if only seen from a distance, made me think about many things.

I saw Luca staring at me as I slowly approached, I certainly didn't want to ruin that intense moment, knowing the difficulties that both of them had gone through until a few minutes ago, but at that moment the phone started to ring, it was probably Livia, maybe she was scared...so I decided to answer without even looking at who it was.

"Listen to me, the things that are going around about us we have to put them to rest right now, I don't want to ruin this pitiful story, so I propose a peace, even if it's fictitious, that will allow us to move on, on our own paths. I'll see you at the Green Carpet, both of us accompanied, we'll pretend nothing happened, clear?" .