BOREALIS ☽ Leah Clearwater ✔

Chapter 18... Want

The fire was roaring in our backyard firepit. I was distracting myself by tending to it, feeding it logs and prodding at it to keep my mind and hands busy. I didn't want to think about what—who—was coming.

True to his word, Billy had called the other packs and told them they had to meet to discuss some urgent business. He hadn't revealed what exactly that business was, to prevent any sort of plans from forming, but I was still on edge. I didn't want to imagine the reaction Josh's arrival was going to get from the rest of the packs.

Quil and Embry were already here, but they were keeping close to Jake's side. They were talking in hushed voices and judging by their tight brows and scowls, they weren't pleased with the news. I could probably figure out what they were whispering about if I listened hard enough, but I didn't want to—besides, I already had a pretty good idea. If they had any sense, they were worried, worried about how Sam was going to react to this news. I was worried, too. What would Sam say? What would he do?

No, I told myself, my thoughts screeching to a stop in my head. Don't go down that path. I picked up another huge log and threw it onto the fire, sending an eruption of sparks flying up into the darkening sky.

"Easy now," Mom said as she approached from behind. Charlie was next to her, and they were both carrying huge trays of snacks and drinks. "You don't want the fire to get too big."

I grunted a response and stepped forward to help them with the trays. I took the largest and heaviest looking one from Charlie and headed for the table that was already set up. If the fire didn't need me, then I could at least keep myself busy with this.

I heard a crack of an opening can and looked back at Charlie. He had found a seat at the fire's edge and was opening what looked like a can of cola, rather than his usual beer. When I looked down at the tray of drinks in my hands, I realized that there was not a single beer, though it was a usual staple of our gatherings.

Mom seemed to read my mind. "I didn't think beer was a good idea tonight. There will be a lot of heightened emotions, and alcohol only makes emotions worse," she said as she arranged the hot dog buns and condiments.

"Smart," I said. Yeah, there was definitely going to be some heightened emotion...

Mom glanced around to see if anyone was paying attention. Embry, Quil and Jake were still arguing in the corner, Charlie and now Billy and Seth were around the fire, and Josh was...

Where was Josh? My heart skipped a beat.

"He's inside," she explained as she watched my frantic turning, searching for him. "He needed some time to himself before everyone showed up. And Billy thinks its better if he stays out of sight for now."

"Oh." My shoulders slumped with relief. For a brief moment, I worried that he had left, run out on me, too...

Mom watched me with her sharp, dark eyes. "So, you... imprinted."

I met her gaze. "It appears so."

She closed her eyes for a moment, then sighed. "How do you feel about it?"

"I—" I began, and then my words died in my mouth. "I have no idea, honestly. It's like every part of me is telling me to go to him, be with him, love him... but there's a part of me that's still... unsure."

Mom nodded. "Yes, I can imagine it's a lot to absorb. It is, even for me, so I bet it's a hundred times worse for you. I'll admit that I've prayed for this, for you'd find someone, just to take away your pain."

My eyes fluttered closed. "Well, someone listened, I guess."

"Perhaps a little too well," she admitted. "I also prayed that someone might imprint on you, so that maybe it would help you understand what your cousin went through."